


Call Waiting to the Underworld

by skyrat



Category: Percy Jackson and the Olympians & Related Fandoms - All Media Types, Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rick Riordan, The Heroes of Olympus - Rick Riordan
Genre: Angst, Annabeth is dead, F/M, Humor, M/M, Percico - Freeform, Romance, Slow Build
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-09
Updated: 2014-09-22
Packaged: 2018-02-16 17:21:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 35,183
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2278254
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/skyrat/pseuds/skyrat
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Nico has spent the past three years trying to get as far away as he can from anything that might remind him of Percy Jackson. But an unexpected tragedy sends a desperate Percy after the only person he can think to turn to for help. What Percy wants Nico to do is impossible and they both know it. Now Nico's caught playing telephone conductor to the Underworld, and Percy is blind to the toll it's taking on him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. An Uninvited Guest

**Author's Note:**

> Just a note for future readers…although the release date is fast approaching, this was written before Blood of Olympus was published. So I tried to keep this as close to canon as my (admittedly fallible) memory would allow, but any canon events that will happen in BoO won't be accuately depicted in this story.

When he'd said he was never coming back, Nico had meant it. He'd seen his mission and promises out of course; made sure the Athena Parthenos was safely delivered. Waited until it was clear that Gaea was defeated and everyone was safe (as safe as demigods can ever be at least) and then he'd bolted. Jason had predictably tried to intervene but Nico was an expert at disappearing; his one pseudo-friend hadn't stood a chance at stopping him. Nico di Angelo was gone before the victory celebrations had really started and he hadn't looked back. He'd slipped erratically from shadow to shadow, on no set course and without attention to direction. When he stopped he didn't know what state he was in, or even if he'd left the country. He preferred it that way. If he didn't even know where he was, what were the chances anyone else could find him?

Not that anyone would have gone looking, anyway.

...Or so he thought.

His voluntary ostracism lasted three years.

Three years, four months and 27 days—not that he was counting.

(Okay, so maybe he _was_ counting but really, what else was there to do when you were living alone in a derelict cabin on the fringe of a town too small and forgotten to even have its own post office? Nico had to do _something_ to kill the time.)

He still spent a fair amount of time in the underworld, but not quite as much as he would have preferred. The Underworld was after all, where people expected him to go. The idea of being that pathetically predictable irritated him. Never mind that it didn't actually matter if he were predictable since no one would bother trying to find him there. It was the principle of the thing.

His principles were pretty much the only thing he had left, after all. He was utterly alone. _Alone_ alone, and that's exactly what he wanted. Well, it's what he wanted second to that o _ther_ thing he wanted, the topic-off-limits-thing, the thing that he didn't even let himself abstractly think about because contrary to how he might look to outsiders, Nico wasn't a masochist. There was no point in letting himself dwell on stuff that only hurt. He had better things to do. Like pace aimlessly around his predominately empty cabin. Fight the occasional monster that showed up. And concoct more and more elaborate ways to tally his increasingly long list of days spent alone.

Okay, so maybe he didn't have the healthiest way of coping with things, but at least he was coping.

He sensed the intruder long before the knock. It wasn't often that anything living larger than a bird came within fifty feet of him. (Other than monsters of course, but they gave off an entirely different vibe than mortals or demigods; he could tell the difference a long way off.) Nico was very in tune with his sparse surroundings and noticed immediately that a demigod was approaching.

He considered disappearing. There was no shortage of shadows in the surrounding room and he could easily vanish before whoever it was out there so much as had a chance to set foot on the doorstep (which sported a very bold 'Not Welcome' mat...installed primarily for Nico's own amusement since he didn't expect any callers and none ever came—until today.) 

He hesitated though. He was in _his_ own house, wasn't he? (Sure it was technically an abandoned old junk heap that he was more squatting in than legal owner of, but still, he was the one currently taking care of this place.) He shouldn't have to run away. And he'd made it very clear he didn't want anything to do with anyone. Whoever had come to bother him deserved an earful. There would be something very satisfying in slamming the door in the face of whoever was out there.

(If he were honest with himself he'd acknowledge that having the chance to slam his door in the face of one of his old... _acquaintances_...is something he'd downright longed to do. But Nico wasn't all that great at being honest with himself, even now.)

He convinced himself that he was opening the door merely to ensure that whoever was out there would know to never come back. If he ran they might persistently keep trying to track him down. That would certainly be a bother. He just had to make sure his intentions were clear so that he could go back to his very important solitude. He certainly wasn't opening the door because he actually _wanted_ to see whoever was out there. That was just crazy.

He swung the door open dramatically, expecting to find some camper he didn't know, but probably someone carrying a message from Jason, or maybe (just maybe, but probably not) Hazel. Or barring a half-blood, possibly a term life insurance salesman (wouldn't that be ironic, Nico might have even enjoyed telling one of those off.)

Really, he would have guessed pretty much anyone except who he found there.

He should have run.

"Uh..." His well rehearsed 'go away' died on his lips.

Percy didn't say anything.

Nico's grip tightened on the doorknob. He knew already though that he wasn't going to slam it. He couldn't—and not because it was Percy standing in the door. Under normal circumstances Percy Jackson would have been the top of his list of people whose face he would have absolutely _loved_ to slam a door in (not because he honestly thought Percy deserved it, just because it would have felt great, and there weren't a whole lot of things that made Nico feel particularly good anymore. For all the crud he'd been dealt in his life, he felt he deserved that one small gratification.)

The problem was, the young man standing on Nico's novelty 'Not Welcome' mat wasn't Percy. Not the proper Percy. Not the Percy who'd rescued him as a kid or the Percy he'd thought failed his sister or even the more battered but triumphant Percy he'd seen climb out of Tartarus. He would have recognized the life force of _that_ Percy before he’d opened the door (of course then he probably wouldn't have opened the door at all—he definitely would have bolted.) This person didn't feel like the right Percy any more than he looked like him. This was just some zombie-like shade that sort of vaguely resembled Percy, but couldn't possibly be the real one. This person was too broken to be Percy Jackson. And Percy Jackson wasn't breakable. If there was one thing Nico had ever had any faith in it was that.

Well, _except._

There was one scenario that Nico could imagine which might prove that conviction fallible.

It was too awful to consider, but the second the thought crossed his mind, Nico knew _exactly_ what must of happened. There was only one thing that would make someone look like that. Nico knew, because he'd seen the same haunted expression in his own reflection more times than he could count.

And just like that he knew why Percy was here.

"I can't help you," he snapped.

It came out meaner than he'd meant it to, but Nico was panicking. Even given the circumstances—caught between the warring instincts to shove Percy away and throw his arms out to tackle him in a hug—being caustic still seemed like the safer course of action.

Percy either expected Nico's reaction, or was too far lost on autopilot to react to the animosity. He was unblinkingly silent for a moment, and then said, "You're the _only_ person who can help me."

"You only _think_ I can help you," Nico retaliated, voice dropping to a hiss (he was paranoid about the wrong sets of ears overhearing a conversation like this, never mind the fact that he didn't have a single neighbor to overhear.) "I can't. You're wrong. I'm the last person who can help you right now, Percy. Go back to camp. Be with your friends. Go see your mom. Or a therapist. _Go away_."

There, he finally said it. Too bad he didn't mean it.

"I need you."

And wasn’t _that_ the kicker. Just how many years had Nico longed to hear exactly that phrase come from exactly that mouth? It didn't matter that not-really-Percy's voice was flat and emotionless as he said the words. That he knew what Percy really meant was 'I need your abilities' and not 'I need my _friend:_ _Nico di Angelo'_. It didn't matter. That one simple sentence was still an effective sledgehammer to Nico's carefully constructed wall. He slumped against the doorframe.

"You look terrible," he muttered, waving Percy inside. "You might as well eat something before I throw you out."

He didn't mean that of course, and he knew it. He only said it because really, that's probably what Percy expected him to say. Not to mention he was slightly afraid that if he didn't say _something_ Percy would be able to hear the hammering of his jacked up traitorous heart over the silence. He couldn’t even tell if it was hammering out of anticipation of bad news, or just because his former (okay, not actually former, more like ongoing, never mind the three year hiatus) crush was standing twelve inches away from him.

He was so pathetic.

Percy shuffled inside, allowing Nico to steer him into a chair. He sat there vacantly while Nico backed into the kitchen.

With a thick wooden door between him and Percy, Nico allowed himself to properly freak out.

He paced around the small room, opening cupboards as he went despite the fact that he knew they were all pretty much empty and he wasn’t going to find anything in them.

 _Percy Jackson is in my house,_ thought Nico hysterically. _Percy came to find_ me _. Percy needs me._

There was only one topic anyone ever wanted Nico’s help with. People came to Nico when someone was dead.

People only looked like Percy did right now when someone _important_ was dead. Someone more important than anyone else.

Someone like Annabeth.

“Oh gods,” moaned Nico under his breath. “This _sucks_.”

He put a kettle on the stove and turned it on, intending to make tea. Not that Nico was big on drinking tea or anything, it just seemed like the appropriate thing to do at a time like this. But then of course Nico remembered that he didn’t actually own any tea (attributed to that whole not being really big on drinking it thing) and turned the stove off again. He grabbed a can of coke from the fridge and set it on a tray.

“Hm,” he said, staring hard at the tray’s lone occupant. He turned back to the fridge. Unfortunately that can of coke had been pretty much the only thing in his fridge, aside from a half empty bottle of ketchup that probably carbon dated back to the cretaceous period. He tried the freezer. It was marginally more fruitful, revealing a bag of freezer-burned peas and some frozen blueberries.

“Huh,” said Nico staring into the frozen abyss. His hand hovered in the open door for a moment before a distant memory of an interlude at Percy’s mom’s apartment guided him to grab the fruit. He poured some blueberries into a bowl and plopped it on the tray next to the soda. On another day he might have actually tried defrosting them before serving them to a guest, but Nico was still a bit distracted by his frenzied thought loop of ‘ _Oh gods, Annabeth’s dead._ ’ Besides, he'd never gotten around to acquiring a microwave.

He caught his reflection in the aluminum bottom of the tray in his hands—the hollow, exhaustion-ringed eyes gazing back at him did not belong to a face that someone would go to for comfort. He already knew that wasn’t why Percy was here though. Percy was here to ask him to bring Annabeth back. And that was something Nico _couldn’t_ do. And Percy _knew_ that. But he was going to ask anyway, because grief trumped common sense. Grief trumped pretty much everything. Nico knew that better than anyone. Percy was here to do exactly what Nico would do in his place. Hell, what Nico had already attempted.

Percy was going to ask and Nico was going to have to tell him no.

And as certain as Nico was that he couldn’t bring Annabeth back, he was almost equally certain that he couldn’t say ‘no’ to Percy Jackson.

 _Gods this sucked_.

Nico glanced down at his reflection again. _You’re the son of Hades_ , he reminded himself. _You’re the freaking Ghost King. You can handle saying no to Percy._

He steeled his nerve and pushed back through the door.

“Uh, you caught me between grocery trips,” Nico muttered apologetically as he dropped the tray in front of Percy. “I wasn’t expecting company. Sorry.”

_Cue smart-ass comment from Percy about how Nico had probably never set foot in a grocery store in his entire life. Cue joke about how he better start eating more because he looks like the living dead. Cue any reaction at all._

Percy just stared at the wall.

Nico pushed the tray a little closer, kind of distantly hoping Percy would notice that he remembered his whole weird hang-up about blue food. Nico got no reaction.

“So.” Nico coughed uncomfortably. “Tell me what happened to her.”

“I don’t want to talk about it.”

 _Believe me, you and me both_ , thought Nico. He kept that comment to himself though. Instead he said, “If you’re about to ask me what I think you’re here to ask me, you owe me details.”

A silent staring match ensued. It didn’t last long though. Nico could out-stare anyone; it was what he usually did instead of talking to people. Even under good circumstances Percy wouldn’t have stood a chance. In this shattered state it only took minutes for his desperation-tinged eyes to dart away and his head to tilt towards the table.

“Accident,” mumbled Percy.

“Really?” Nico couldn’t mask the surprise in his voice. He’d expected to hear ‘manticore’ or ‘vengeful titan’ or pretty much anything that was unique to the dangerous lifestyle forced upon demigods. ‘Accident’ was far too mundane a word to have gotten the best of Annabeth Chase. Maybe it was an ‘accident with a gorgon’ or something.

“Yeah,” confirmed Percy, voice almost cracking as the veil of disengagement finally broke. His blank stare had gone wild as he turned his eyes back to Nico. “A blazing _accident_. It wasn’t even anybody’s fault! There's no bad guy. Just a weakened cross beam and Anna—" his voice choked as he tried to say her name, "—beth standing in the wrong place at the wrong time."

"Oh," said Nico. There really wasn't anything else he could think to say. 'I'm sorry to hear that' didn't quite cut it.

"She was killed by a _building_!" said Percy hysterically. "Is that supposed to be some kind of sick joke?"

 _Probably_ , thought Nico. But instead he said, "Life and death aren't fair. It sucks. Believe me it _sucks_. But they're not."

(And this is the point where if Nico were someone else he'd have crossed the gap and hugged Percy, or at least put a hand on his shoulder—offered some sort of comforting gesture that normal people do when they see someone they care about breaking. But Nico wasn't someone else and he'd sort of forgotten how to even pretend to be normal. He was too afraid to touch Percy, even when it would be clear that his intentions were purely out of sympathy and not because— Nico abruptly cut off that thought.)

"We saved the world _twice_ ," continued Percy. "Something like that shouldn't have happened to someone like her."

"No," agreed Nico.

"And she—" Percy choked. "—I mean I—" His eyes went unfocused and he seemed to lose his train of thought. "I can't even get revenge. There's nothing I can do about it."

Nico nodded. "It wouldn't have made you feel better. I say that from experience."

"I need your experience." Percy finally cut to the chase.

"No you don't."

" _Please._ " Percy directed red-rimmed tear stained eyes at Nico. " _Please_ , Nico. Help me bring her back."

"I can't," said Nico quickly.

"You brought Hazel ba—"

"You know the circumstances with that," Nico quickly interrupted him. "That wasn't anything _I_ did. The Doors of Death were already open. And they're _closed_ now. You know that. You know that better than anyone."

Percy opened his mouth and Nico cut him off again.

"And don't even think of suggesting we open them again. I swear I'll punch you."

"I've seen you bring people back from the dead," Percy said instead. "You do it all the time."

"As skeletons and ghosts!" said Nico. "If I did that Annabeth would be a _zombie_."

Percy didn't say anything.

"You _don't_ want me to do that," insisted Nico. "Annabeth sure as heck wouldn't want me to do that."

"Don't pretend you have any idea what Annabeth would want," muttered Percy darkly. "You haven't even been around."

That stung.

"And you shouldn't pretend you have any idea what the dead would want," retorted Nico. "Being dead—it's— _different_. She's not going to be the same Annabeth."

"She'll always be the same Annabeth."

_Ironic, hearing him claim that when right this moment he wasn't even the same Percy._

"No." Nico tried to be firm. "She _won't_."

"Even in Tartarus she was the same Annabeth," Percy persisted. "The Underworld can't change her more than _there_."

"She was still alive in Tartarus," Nico pointed out. "It's not the place. It's the _state_."

"But Hazel—" Percy started again.

"—Is a child of Pluto," said Nico. "The rules affect her differently. That's how I found her, you know. She was different from all the other souls down there. She glaringly stood out. Death didn't affect her the same way."

"But—"

"Annabeth isn't Hazel," he reiterated harshly.

"You could talk to your dad—" Percy suggested pathetically.

Nico didn't mean to, but he started to laugh. There was no humor in it, but he just couldn't stop himself. It was just such a terrible idea. Did Percy really think he hadn't tried something like that already? Did he really even for a second think something like that would work? Staring at Percy now, Nico was reminded of his own very desperate self all those years ago. And that was just surreal. Percy was...well he was _Percy Jackson_. Golden Child. Fulfiller of prophecies. Always-saves-the-day-guy. The smiling, always positive, too-nice-to-be-real guy. Percy was perfect. He shouldn't have ever had anything in common with someone like Nico di Angelo. This was just too messed up.

"Uh, Percy, think about that for a second," he said. "If something like that actually worked, don't you think that Bianca and my mom would still be around?"

Percy didn't say anything.

"He wouldn't break the rules for his own daughter. And she was his favorite. He's not going to make an exception for Annabeth."

"But we could at least _ask_ ," persisted Percy. "Maybe we can think of a reason that--"

" _No_ ," said Nico. "That won't work. Percy—"

"We have to _try_."

"No. Percy. It'll probably just make him mad. He kind of hates you, remember? Bothering dad could make everything _worse_."

"It couldn't get worse than this."

"Oh, it could get a _lot_ worse."

"Nothing could possibly be worse than being separated from Annabeth."

Nico narrowed his eyes. This was turning into the worst day he'd had since...since freaking _Croatia_. He was sorry about Annabeth. He really was. He might have been jealous of her, but he still regarded her pretty highly. And he certainly hadn't ever wanted anything bad to happen to her. That didn't mean though that he could handle much more of Percy smearing in his face just how happy the two of them had been together in their blissfully picturesque power-couple relationship. He couldn't deal with this. He'd left town for a _reason_.

"Look," he said, very cautiously. "Percy. I know this is awful. I know exactly how you're—" _Oops, wrong thing to say_.

He knew better than to have said that. It was _always_ the wrong thing to say.

"No you don't," snapped Percy automatically. "You have _no idea_ how I'm feeling. This isn't the same at all. You've never had—"

Nico's already narrowed eyes hardened into murderous slits. A floorboard cracked.

Percy stopped midsentence. Not because he'd noticed just how angry Nico suddenly was and self preservation had kicked in—no, apparently he'd been struck by a small epiphany. 

"Oh I get it," he announced, oblivious to the suddenly dangerous atmosphere in the room. "Annabeth was totally right."

"About... _what_?" Nico all but hissed. He knew he wasn't going to like the answer but he had to ask.

"About you."

Another floorboard cracked. Percy didn't seem to notice.

"You're in love with her too," said Percy in a far too confident voice.

Outside several bushes died, but Percy couldn't see that.

"You're mistaken." Nico's voice was dangerously quiet.

"Is that why you're refusing to help me?" Percy recklessly plowed on. "If she's in the Underworld, you'll be able to still see her but I won't. You'll have her all to yourse—"

Nico punched Percy harder than he'd ever hit anyone or anything. He didn't look back to make sure his friend was okay before plunging into the nearest shadow.

* * *

 

Nico immediately regretted it. Well, as soon as his head cleared enough to think straight, he regretted it. First he repeatedly pummeled the nearest wall until his fist was bloody. That was the real reason he’d run away; Percy wouldn’t have escaped with a single strike if Nico hadn’t put serious distance between them. He was probably in another time zone now.

Nico swayed on his feet, dizzy from the exertion of a lengthy jump mixed with a very unpleasant cocktail of emotions. He closed his eyes and clutched his stomach.

This…was a _nightmare_.

It was bad enough that he’d just learned that he’d lost one of his almost-friends. (He probably should have been aware of her death immediately when it had happened, but Nico had gotten into the habit of deliberately _not_ tuning in to her.)

It was bad enough that pretty much the most important person in his life had just proved that they had no reason to bother with seeing him unless they needed to use him.

It was bad enough that he’d just had to endure the thing he’d run away from being rubbed in his face.

But did Percy really think so low of him to actually believe that Nico would refuse to help save someone’s life for the sake of stealing his _girlfriend_?

 _Of course he thinks you’d do that_ , nagged Nico’s insecurity. _You’ve given him tons of reasons not to trust you. And it’s not like you’ve ever been honest to him about your feelings._

He felt like he was going to throw up. He probably would have, actually, but there wasn’t any food in his stomach to lose. Nico hadn’t remembered to eat anything recently.

“Percy’s not thinking clearly,” Nico said aloud, trying to convince himself. “That wasn’t really Percy talking. He didn’t mean that.”

He frowned, thinking back on just how wrecked Percy had looked. That had definitely not been ‘normal Percy.’ For the first time he wondered what else Percy might have gone through in the three years since he’d last seen him. Annabeth’s death might have been only the most recent in a long string of hardships. He really had no idea. As Percy had pointed out, Nico hadn’t been around.

Would things have possibly turned out differently somehow if he hadn’t left?

_Dangerous line of thought, di Angelo._

Nico sat down long enough to let the dizziness pass. Then he stepped into the nearest shadow. He had some errands to run.

* * *

 

Percy really hated waking up. He only ever had bad dreams since… _the incident_. But those bad dreams were better than waking up. There was always that split second where you’re disorientated from sleeping and your memory hasn’t kicked in yet. For a fractional moment you almost feel rested and calm. You’re relieved that the dreams were just dreams. And then the gears start turning again and the crushing reality of _knowing_ descends. No bad dream was as bad as the cleaving knowledge Percy was doomed to wake up to. He never wanted to get out of bed once his memory returned. There was no point in getting up if Annabeth wasn’t there.

Today though, the temptation to stay in bed wasn’t quite as strong as usual. This bed was a bit less soft than the one he was used to. It felt weird. He wasn’t in his own room.

Percy sat up and the abrupt movement made him wince in pain. His cheek was _throbbing_. He gingerly reached up and felt a substantial welt under his left eye.

What the heck had happened?

He carefully scoped out his surroundings: dark grey sheets pooled around him, peeking out from beneath a black duvet. There were light blocking curtains over the windows. A very realistic framed oil painting of a skull hung over the bed. There was really not more than one option of whose room he could possibly be in.

 _Nico_.

Nico is what had happened.

Nico was nowhere to be seen. He must have slept in the other room—which seemed kind of weird. Nico had looked downright murderous the last Percy had seen him. Why would he bother giving Percy his bed if he were mad enough to punch Percy’s lights out? He ought to have woken up on the floor. Or even dumped outside wouldn’t have surprised him.

Nico really confused him. And—

—Was something burning?

Percy got out of bed and creaked open the door; cautiously checking to make sure he hadn’t just been tricked into an ambush.

There was no one in close proximity, but across the room a dark figure was stooped over the stove. It was muttering a stream of curses mostly in English, but sporadically peppered with random bits of Italian and Greek. Percy didn’t know Italian but it was pretty easy to get the gist of what Nico was saying.

Normally he would have announced something like ‘good morning’ but that didn’t quite seem like the right thing to say to someone who had said good night to you with his fist. So for lack of a proper greeting, Percy coughed.

Nico started at the noise, jumping a little in surprise and accidently bringing his hand down on the edge of a cast iron skillet in his attempt to recover. Then he jumped again, this time from the burning metal. The expletives intensified as he dashed to the sink to get his hand under cold water.

“Uh, sorry!” said Percy, feeling genuinely bad for startling Nico.

“I’M FINE.” Nico spun around, leaning against the sink, striking a casual pose. He started running his fingers through his hair, only to catch himself and quickly slap that hand down on the counter. A few seconds later his fingers started nervously drumming on the linoleum countertop.

“There’s food now,” said Nico, gesturing for Percy to sit at the table. “Like actual real food this time.”

“Oh.” Percy wasn’t sure how to react to that.

“Sit,” said Nico, waving at the table again. “You didn’t eat anything yesterday.”

“Um, okay.” Percy was still trying to measure how to react. He figured he _ought_ to be mad at Nico right now; he’d punched him after all. And he hadn’t agreed to help Percy, which under different circumstances might have been something he’d respect, but these circumstances were too crucial and desperate for Percy to easily accept no for an answer. On the other hand though, Nico seemed to be trying to make up for his bad behavior. And he hadn’t explicitly said ‘no’ yet either. Percy was pretty sure once Nico had officially refused his request the next thing he’d see is a door in his face. The fact that Percy was still here and Nico was cooking him breakfast meant his friend was actually still thinking about it.

Hang on, cooking him breakfast? Nico could cook?

A plate of leathery blackened discs that might at one point in their brief existence made an attempt to be pancakes was dropped on the table in front of Percy.

No. Apparently Nico _couldn’t_ cook.

Percy poked at one with a fork. It made a brittle crunching noise. “Thanks,” he said, trying to build up the willpower to actually take a bite.

“They were supposed to be blue,” muttered Nico as he took a stab at one of the black pancakes on his own plate. “But I used too much food coloring. And then they kind of burned.”

Percy took a closer look at the charred mess on his plate. Now that Nico mentioned it, they _were_ sort of a bluish hue of black. Under different circumstances he probably would have smiled at the gesture. He didn’t really have that in him right now though, so he just said “Thanks.”

“So,” said Nico, still stabbing at his own food more than actually eating it.

“Yeah,” said Percy, mirroring his actions.

“I _can’t_ bring Annabeth back,” Nico finally broached the topic again.

Percy opened his mouth to object, to beg, to say anything that might cross his mind to change Nico’s.

Nico held up a hand, cutting Percy off.

“But I can help you talk to her,” he finished. “I have enough supplies for a summoning now.”

" _Thank you_ ," said Percy emphatically. For the first time in days he felt a sliver of something like hope. He looked at Nico gratefully.

Nico didn't return the eye contact. "Don't thank me yet. You might not...like the experience as much as you think you will."

"I _have_ to talk to her," Percy insisted.

"I know," sighed Nico. "But you might not like what she says."

"She couldn't possibly say anything that would upset me more than never talking to her again," said Percy.

Nico mumbled something under his breath but Percy couldn't make out what he'd said.

"What?" asked Percy.

Nico's eyes snapped up, examining Percy warily as if to determine if he'd actually heard him or not. Finally he said, "I'm not actually very hungry. Why don't we get started?"

* * *

 

Nico gathered together a bag of groceries and led Percy outside. The last time he'd done a summoning he'd made skeletons dig the hole for him. He was more in control of his powers now though, and all Nico had to do was look at the spot he'd chosen for the summoning and the ground simply opened up for him.

He started chanting in Greek as he opened several cans of soda and a jug of orange juice, pouring them into the hole. After that he tossed in a few bagels, a carton of egg salad and a ham sandwich. (He had no idea what Annabeth had liked to eat, but the dead weren't usually too picky. He'd just haphazardly grabbed stuff in his frenzied visit to the store.)

He could see Percy holding his breath as he said the final summoning words. “Let the dead taste again. Let them remember.”

A translucent apparition of Annabeth Chase glimmered into view.

"Hey Seaweed Brain," she said, smiling affectionately.

"ANNABETH!"

Nico had to reach out and grab Percy to stop him from running right into the hole. Percy immediately came back to himself and halted, remembering that he wouldn't actually be able to touch her. Nico's hand lingered just a few seconds too long on Percy's before he let go. He wiped it on his jeans as if he could erase his awkwardness along with the feel of Percy's skin.

"So," said Annabeth, looking at Percy meaningfully.

" _Annabeth_ ," Percy just desperately repeated.

"Really didn't see this coming, did we?" She said. "Kind of lousy, huh?"

"I'm going to fix it," Percy said determinedly.

Nico glared at him.

"I knew you were going to say that," said Annabeth, smiling wistfully. "Look, Percy—"

"I'm going to _fix_ it," Percy repeated forcefully. "Just hang on Annabeth, I'm going to come get you."

"Don't you dare, Lunkhead."

Percy blinked. "What?"

"Don't you even consider for a _minute_ coming down here, Percy. Don't."

"Annabeth...?"

Nico watched as Percy's determination crumbled into confusion.

"You won't make it out again," she said. For the first time she acknowledged Nico's presence, sparing him a glance that conveyed 'hey, back me up here.' Nico nodded.

"I will,” Percy insisted. “I’ve been down there before.”

"No you won't," Annabeth countered. "I'm _supposed_ to be here. You're not. If you try to fix this you'll just get stuck here too. You won't make it back out."

Percy's brow furrowed. "I'm okay with that," he said carefully.

"Well _I'm_ not!" exclaimed Annabeth. And for once Nico utterly agreed with her.

“What happened to the only thing mattering is that we’re together?” Percy’s tone was hurt.

“That didn’t extend to it being okay for you to _kill_ yourself!” said Annabeth. “I’m not going anywhere. You’ll see me here at the right time. Don’t you _dare_ rush.”

“I can’t—I can’t wait that long,” argued Percy. “Annabeth—”

“You have to.” Annabeth’s ghost cut him off. “Percy, I’m okay down here. I really am. You’re going to be okay too.”

Percy shook his head.

“You are. Nico,” she turned back to Nico expectantly, “tell him it’s alright.”

Nico snorted but didn’t say anything.

“Nico!”

Nico crossed his arms and scowled. “I didn’t ask to get dragged into this. I’m not going to lie to him.”

Annabeth made an exasperated noise. “Not. Helping.” She complained.

“Hey I’ve helped plenty,” said Nico pointedly. “But that’s cool, you don’t have to thank me or anything for letting you guys talk.”

Annabeth and Nico glared at each other for a moment. Then she surprised him with “Thank you.”

“Don’t mention it,” mumbled Nico.

Annabeth’s ghost took an insubstantial step closer to Percy. “Swear to me on the River Styx that you won’t come after me,” she said solemnly.

Percy was silent.

“Percy! _Swear_ ,” she pleaded.

“I can’t promise that,” said Percy.

“I _need_ you to!” Annabeth’s voice grew desperate.

“And I need _you_ ,” Percy said equally desperately.

“No.” Annabeth said forcefully. “You _don’t_.”

Nico watched as Percy’s jaw dropped in disbelief.

“I love you Seaweed Brain,” she added quickly. “But this isn’t good for you. I should go.”

“Wait—”

Annabeth blinked out of view before Percy could finish his objection.

Percy stood shell-shocked for several minutes, just staring into the empty void left behind by Annabeth. Finally he turned to Nico.

“Bring her back again!”

“I can’t.”

“What do you mean you can’t?” said Percy. He grabbed on to Nico’s arm and shook him.

“I can’t—” Nico gulped. It was hard to maintain his train of thought with Percy’s fingers digging into his skin like that. “—Force her to show up if she doesn’t want to be summoned,” he explained. “We’ll have a better chance of it working if we wait a bit. We can try again tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow,” Percy hollowly repeated.

Nico put his hand over Percy’s with the intention of prying his fingers off his arm. Somewhere in the process though his brain stopped working properly and he forgot to follow through. Percy didn’t seem to notice the fact that their fingers were practically entwined.

“We’ll summon her again tomorrow,” he reiterated.

Percy nodded. His nod kept going though, until his head crashed against Nico’s shoulder. Nico lost track of how long they stood there, Percy sobbing long past the point of soaking Nico’s T-shirt through with tears.

* * *

 

It seemed like Percy had needed to get a good solid breakdown out of his system. After he’d finally calmed down, he appeared a little bit more like the old Percy again.

Actually, he seemed a little too much like the old Percy again. Nico suspected he was only more cheerful because he was up to something.

Not suspected, really. Nico _knew_ that Percy was up to something. Percy had pretty much admitted as much when he’d refused to promise Annabeth.

He would have been more concerned, but Nico was pretty sure any plans that Percy might have would probably involve Nico’s help. It didn’t seem very likely that he’d have to worry about him doing anything reckless without at least giving Nico some sort of warning first (after which he’d almost definitely do something reckless, but at least Nico would be ready for it.)

Percy was disconcertingly upbeat as he offered to make lunch, and then a few hours later repeated the offer for dinner. (Nico figured he probably should have been offended that Percy apparently didn't want to eat anything Nico touched, but this scenario was a little too much like one of his fantasies come to life for him to turn the offers down.) He couldn't even remember the last time he'd bothered to eat both lunch _and_ dinner in the same day. It felt weird and extravagant.

When night came Nico found himself in a bit of a bind. He didn't really have anything to accommodate entertaining an overnight guest. Sleeping bags and air mattresses weren't exactly the sorts of things he'd ever expected to need, and it hadn't occurred to him the previous night to get that sort of supplies amidst his errands. He hadn't intended to let Percy stay. He'd resolved to do the summoning, but after that he'd meant to kick Percy out. A second summoning had definitely not been on his agenda, and even less had he intended to let Percy spend another night.

"You can have the bed again," Nico chivalrously offered. "I'll sleep on the couch."

 "No," said Percy immediately. "I don't want to impose that much. I'll sleep on the couch."

"You absolutely won't" countered Nico. "You're a guest. You'll take the bed."

"I'm a self-invited guest," said Percy. "I'll take the couch."

"No way, I _insist_."

"No _I_ insist," argued Percy.

"Are you trying to say my bed isn't good enough for you?" Nico accidently asked. Then felt his face start burning as he really thought about how loaded that had sounded.

Luckily Percy remained oblivious to Nico's discomfort. "No, it's fine. I just won't be able to sleep if I feel guilty for putting you out."

"Well get over that," snapped Nico. "I still insist. This discussion is over."

"I'll tell you what," said Percy. "I'll take it tonight if you're going to be that stubborn. But you'll let me sleep on the couch _after_ that, okay?"

"Excuse me?"

"Like, tomorrow night," Percy clarified. "I'll sleep on the couch tomorrow and after that."

" _Hang on_ ," said Nico. "Who the heck said you could stay here tomorrow night? And what do you mean _and after that_? "

"Oh." Percy looked stunned. "I just assumed...."

"We're doing another summoning tomorrow," said Nico quickly. "But after that you're outta here. There isn't going to be a 'tomorrow night'. You're leaving."

Percy was quiet for a few minutes. "I don't really have anywhere else to go," he finally confessed.

"What are you talking about? You have _loads_ of places to go. You have more places you could go than probably anyone else I know. Not one but _two_ camps. New Rome. Your mom's place. Your dad's place..."

"Too painful," said Percy quietly. "Most of those places remind me of...." he coughed. "...Annabeth. You know? I can't stand to be around any of them right now. It hurts too much."

"So that just defaults you here, huh?" Nico muttered. "You're fine _here_ because I'm pretty much the _anti_ -Annabeth, aren't I? Great."

"What?" Percy looked confused by Nico's sudden display of bitterness.

"Goodnight Percy," Nico snapped. He started stalking towards his bedroom door, only to remember that he couldn't go there because he'd just talked Percy into taking his room. He turned around, panicking because there weren't really any other rooms he could escape to. "I'm going out for a walk," he improvised. "See you tomorrow." He all but jumped out the door.

"Nico?" Percy asked in bafflement at the slamming door. He had _no idea_ what he'd done wrong.

* * *

 

Percy didn't explicitly ask to stay again the next night; he just didn't take the initiative to leave without being told to. Nico somehow conveniently forgot to tell him to scram. He let Percy sleep on the couch this time, because to insist otherwise would draw attention to the fact that he'd neglected to un-invite him.

The second summoning hadn't gone all that differently from the first. Annabeth had been argumentative and Percy had been stubborn and it had ended abruptly to no one’s satisfaction. Like the sleeping arrangement, Percy hadn't verbally asked Nico to do anything more. This time Nico hadn't offered. Nonetheless a silent agreement hung between them that they'd try again.

And again.

“Hey Kelp Face,” sighed Annabeth for the seventh or eighth time. “What’s up? Can’t say a whole lot is different down here. Just been…you know. Hanging out. Being dead. Not much to tell.”

“I’ve had an idea to break you out,” said Percy excitedly. “I thought maybe if I got Grover to record a bunch of songs and then I put some sedatives in a dog biscuit I could…..”

“No.”

“Annabeth? Come back!”

And again.

“I hope you’re calling me to swear that you’re going to let this whole thing drop,” said Annabeth. “Because I’d love to have a conversation with you that doesn’t involve your probable demise.”

“No, I’ve got a really good plan this time.”

“Later, Seaweed Brain.”

“Annabeth!”

And again.

“Hey could you stick to a predictable schedule or something?” Annabeth asked grumpily. “I was in the middle of having lunch with Silena.”

“You have lunch in the underworld?”

“Well, yeah. Not the most exciting lunches. You know, just what you’d expect. Pomegranate salads. Pomegranate soup. Pomegranate tea. On Tuesdays there’s also pomegranate gelato. But only in Elysium. Dessert isn’t really standard in Asphodel. It’s more of a holidays only thing there.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah, so, what’d you want Mud Guppy?”

“Well, I was thinking,” said Percy. “You know how there was Death Mist, right? Well, doesn’t that mean there’s probably an opposite somewhere? Like, maybe I could go on a quest to find some Life Mist and you could use it to pretend you were in the Underworld by mistake. And then you could just walk out of there.”

“Percy,” sighed Annabeth. “No. Just no. That’s a stupid idea.”

“I think it was the best idea I’ve come up with so far.”

“Doesn’t change my assessment.”

“I want to try it—”

“Look Seaweed Brain, even if that kind of Mist exists, which I doubt, and Hades could be tricked by Mist, which I also doubt, do you think he’d let someone down here by mistake walk out of here? No. He’d throw me in a dungeon or incinerate me. That’s how he rolls.”

“Well, if Nico were to distract him—”

“ _Hey!_ ” Nico immediately objected. “Leave me out of it!”

“No, Percy.”

“But—”

“No.”

“But—”

“My gelato is melting. Gotta go.”

“ _Annabeth!!_ ”

And Again.

“Annabeth! You look…kind of happy.”

Annabeth grinned. “Well, they just finished construction on Daedalus’s latest overpass,” explained Annabeth. “And I got this idea that they really ought to add an information center to it. A few people down here get special privileges for visitations out of their districts, right? But since it’s not their main territory it’s easy to get lost. So, you know, just on a whim I submitted a proposal and a blueprint for a multi-functional visitor complex. Hades totally accepted it. They’re going to start laying the foundation next week.”

“Oh, wow. That’s cool. Congratulations!”

“I know, right? I’ve got loads more ideas too that I’m going to start drawing up plans for. Hades is a bit of a traditionalist, you know. There are so many opportunities for renovations. It’s time for some architectural modernizations down here! I’m thinking: neo-classical with an eco-chic twist. So how’re you doing, Fish Boy?”

Percy opened his mouth to answer honestly with ‘terrible, it practically hurts just to keep breathing,’ but paused. This was the first time he’d seen Annabeth looking happy since she’d died. And it had _nothing to do with him_. He couldn’t reconcile how to feel about that. But regardless of whether it made him relieved or hurt, he didn’t want to spoil her happiness.

“I’ll talk to you tomorrow, Annabeth.” He swiped his fingers through the air, dissolving her image before he could change his mind.

* * *

 

In the middle of the third week Percy awoke to find a futon in Nico's living room. He didn't ask where or how Nico had gotten it, but he was silently grateful.

By the fourth week a lot of his clothes and a few other personal belongings that he’d left behind at camp mysteriously appeared as well. Less afraid now that verbally acknowledging these things might break the spell of Nico’s hospitality, Percy thanked him. Nico stared at the floor and muttered something about Percy starting to smell and needing to do laundry.

As the days went by Percy was looking better.

Nico was conversely looking significantly worse.

He didn’t complain, but the constant summoning was draining Nico’s energy. And it didn’t help that he was having a hard time sleeping, knowing that Percy was just on the other side of his bedroom door. He spent most of each night lying awake, thinking about Percy. Thinking about how creeped out Percy would be if he knew how much Nico was lying there thinking about him. Thinking how if he were a decent human being he’d make Percy leave, and spare him the indignity of being thought about like this. (Cue self-loathing interjection that he barely qualified as a human being anyway, being a decent one never made it to the table.) Percy would definitely _want_ to leave if he had even half an idea of the sort of tortuous thoughts swirling around Nico di Angelo’s head every night. He needed for his sake to make him leave. Except, Nico just couldn’t do it.

He actually made a few gallant attempts at banishing his accidental roommate, but the words never quite made it out of his mouth. Percy would always look up and smile in that painfully sincere way that always made Nico feel like he’d swallowed a gallon of earthworms. And Nico’s brain would turn to oatmeal and he’d find himself muttering something inane about the weather or what they were going to have for dinner.

It didn’t help Nico’s predicament that because of all the free time (the summonings never lasted longer than 20 minutes or so) and lack of other people around, Percy kept suggesting they do things together. Things like watching movies (problematic—Nico didn’t have a TV,) or playing games (actually touching that he’d suggest this—too bad Nico had burned his Mythomagic deck,) or spar to keep their fighting skills from getting rusty (danger Nico di Angelo, danger—physical contact, inevitable!) Nico had to invent more and more convoluted excuses to get out of these things (which he really wanted to say yes to more than anything.) Life was turning into one long torture reel of testing his self-control. He was really probably going to go insane any second.

When Nico turned his suggestions down, Percy usually reacted by disappearing into the bathroom for hours on end. Nico didn’t think too much of it, assuming he was probably taking baths. They were nowhere near a natural source of water after all, and it must have been hard on Percy being so disconnected from the sea. On more than one occasion Nico toyed with the idea of offering to shadow travel Percy to a beach somewhere (any beach in the entire world was an option.) He always chickened out though before suggesting it. Having to spend several hours watching Percy running around in a wet bathing suit would definitely push his sanity over the edge. So he pretended that the idea of taking Percy on day trips had never occurred to him and let Percy practically take up residence in his bathtub as compensation.

Every day he had to awkwardly act as voyeur to Percy and Annabeth’s intimate conversations (/arguments.) He’d at least turn around usually in attempt to block them out, but there was no way to escape overhearing. If he stepped too far away the summoning would break. Every single time his heart would wrench and break all over again (half out of empathy for Percy’s sadness, half for his own sake, knowing that he’d never overhear Percy saying those sorts of things to him.) The emotional toll of the summoning was what was getting to him the most. It made him feel more tired and drained than the physical expenditure. Percy had no idea.

Annabeth surprisingly did.

She was unusually subdued one day after being called into an appearance. Both Nico and Percy immediately sensed something was up. She made idle chit chat for a few minutes before dropping the bomb.

“Percy, we can’t keep doing this,” she sighed.

“What do you mean? Of course we can!” Percy predictably responded.

“There isn’t supposed to be this much contact between the living and the dead,” she said. “We’ve been breaking the rules big time. We’re going to get caught.”

“Since when did _you_ care about breaking rules?”

Annabeth changed tactics.

“You’re killing Nico,” she said bluntly.

Nico started at hearing his name mentioned. He turned around in surprise.

Percy blinked. “What are you talking about?”

“Just _look_ at him,” she said, waving in his direction. “I keep expecting him to pass out every time we do this. It isn’t good for him.”

“I’m fine,” Nico said quickly, waving his hands as if to prove Annabeth was being crazy.

Percy slowly turned as if in a daze and squinted at Nico. It was if he were looking at him carefully for the first time in weeks. “Oh,” he said quietly.

Nico felt very in the spotlight as Percy drank in the sight of his skin’s sickly pallor and the clashing inky circles ringing his eyes.  “ _Oh_ ,” said Percy again, frowning heavily.

“We can’t keep doing this,” Annabeth repeated.

“We won’t summon you as often,” Percy promised. “We’ll wait a few days in between so Nico can rest.”

“I’m _fine_ ,” Nico insisted again.

Annabeth shook her head. “No, Percy. I mean it. _We can’t keep doing this_.”

“Yes we can,” said Percy. “We’ll just be more careful.”

“I’m asking for my sake,” she said. “You have to let me go.”

“Annabeth….”

“I was at peace, Percy. I was okay with being dead. This…this makes it not okay. It hurts to keep getting yanked back here and reminded of what I lost. It makes being dead hurt.”

Percy didn’t know what to say to that. “Annabeth…”

“ _Please,_ ” Annabeth implored. “For my sake _and_ yours. This isn’t good for _any_ of us.”

“I can’t—”

“I’ve never heard of something Percy Jackson couldn’t do.” Annabeth gave him a sad smile. “This is the last one, Seaweed Brain. I’m not answering any more summons. I’d better not see you again until you’re 102.”

“Just—“

“Don’t let him be an idiot.” Her last comment was directed at Nico. He’d barely shook his head in agreement before she vanished.

This time Percy didn’t cry. Instead an eerie stillness settled on him as he stared blankly at the now empty yard. Awkward as it had been Nico would have preferred the waterworks. Percy’s current mood reminded him of cliché comments about calm waters before a hurricane.

“I’m sorry,” Nico immediately apologized, expecting Percy to blame him for Annabeth’s decision. “I’m really sorry. I should have—I should have taken more naps or something—we can keep trying. Maybe she didn’t mean it—maybe she’ll change her mind. I mean—”

“It’s not your fault,” Percy said. “I’m the one that needs to apologize. I wasn’t being considerate to how this was affecting you.”

“I always look terrible,” Nico said self-depreciatingly. “I’m powerful enough to handle multiple summonings. You shouldn’t make assumptions about my powers from my stupid appearance. I could have handled this.”

“You don’t look terrible,” Percy countered. “But I wasn’t talking about the physical toll. I know you could handle it. I haven’t been very considerate about your feelings.”

Nico’s heart nearly stopped. Did. Percy. _Know_?

“Uh…” was all Nico managed to get out.

“I knew how you felt about Annabeth and I still made you do this for me over and over again. I know I was being harsh. I—I _needed_ to. But I’m sorry for it.”

“Wait, no,” Nico said in dismay. “I don’t have those kind of feelings for Annabeth. I never—”

“You don’t have to pretend to spare me,” Percy interrupted. “I get it. It’s okay.”

“Uh, you don’t get it at all, actually.”

“Thanks for doing so much for me.” Percy surprised Nico in a crushing hug. For the second time in so many minutes Nico thought for sure his heart was going to freeze in his chest.

“You have my permission to ask her out when she’s back,” Percy announced.

“ _What_?”

Surely Nico must have heard that wrong.

“What are you _talking_ about? What the hell do you mean _back_?”

Percy didn’t answer. He’d already taken off at a run for the house.

Nico sprinted after but Percy was fast.

He heard a door slamming inside, and the sound of water running. The bathroom door was locked when he tried it. Percy didn’t usually lock any of the doors.

“Percy, open the door!” Nico banged loudly.

Percy didn’t answer him. Instead he heard the sound of something metallic plinking against porcelain.

“Iris,” came Percy’s muffled voice through the door. “I need to talk to Hades. Please tell him it’s an emergency.”

“Percy, _no_!” yelled Nico. He shoved himself into the nearest shadow he could find, remerging in the bathroom just in time to see his father’s reflection solidifying in the bathtub.

“I don’t usually answer Iris-messages,” said Hades, with a tone implying that his patience was already worn thin. “But you’ve been causing quite a bit of discord in my domain recently, Percy Jackson. It’s starting to annoy me. This had better be good.”

“I’d like to make a soul exchange,” Percy announced boldly.

Hades rolled his eyes. “Is that so.”

“Yes,” said Percy, not put off by Hades’ attitude. “I’ve cheated death lots of times. I’m a fair trade for Annabeth Chase.”

Hades stared in silence at Percy. He seemed aware of his son’s presence in the room but didn’t acknowledge him. “I—“ began Hades.

“I’m sorry!” yelled Nico, not sure who he was apologizing to, Percy or his dad. He unsheathed his sword and brought it crashing down on the bathtub. The Iris-message terminated as the porcelain exploded and water went everywhere.

“No!” cried Percy. He whipped around and swung at Nico. He wasn’t really aiming or putting his real force into it though and Nico easily dodged.

“How could you,” Percy gasped, swinging blindly again. “I _need_ to do this! He might not answer again! That might have been my only—” Percy stopped struggling and switched to fumbling in his pockets, probably searching for another drachma.

Nico panicked. He grabbed Percy’s arm and yanked him out of reach of the faucets. That didn’t seem nearly safe enough though so he yanked him again. Right into a shadow.


	2. The Art of Stalling

The sweltering humidity was a jarring contrast to the tearing chill of shadow travel. They emerged precariously on a tree branch, dense with foliage and hanging low above water the color of milky coffee. Something pink and porpoise-like broke the surface and then disappeared.

“What?” Percy’s anger at Nico’s interference was at least temporarily eclipsed by confusion.

“The Amazon River,” explained Nico, slightly out of breath. “Have you seen it before? Pretty cool, right?”

“What?” said Percy again.

“First body of water I could think of that wouldn’t be good for Iris-messages,” Nico confessed. “Too opaque.”

“We’re in the rainforest?” Percy asked.

Nico nodded.

“Wait, you took me to a _rainforest_ to try and stop me from making an Iris-message? You do realize it’s probably going to start raining like any second, right?”

Nico’s already washed out complexion went a shade paler.

“We’re not staying long,” he promised. “There are a lot of places I want to show you. You haven’t been to the Baltic Sea either, have you? Or any beaches in Australia? The Seychelles. There are too many things out there you should see. You’re not going to get the chance if you’re dead. The water in the Underworld is going to get pretty boring for you. It’s not exactly good for swimming.”

“Annabeth should get those chances,” Percy said stubbornly. “She deserves them more.”

“That’s a matter of personal opinion,” Nico muttered. “And I’d like to point out that even she disagrees with you.”

“She’ll change her mind when she’s back,” Percy insisted. “It’s what would be right.”

“No she won’t. She’ll feel exactly the same way about it as you. Only worse because she was actually _supposed_ to be dead. Things happen the way they’re supposed to, Percy. Her time ran out.”

Percy shook his head.

“Not to mention, do you have any idea just how _pissed off_ at you she’d be if you made that exchange?” Nico pointed out. “Life is really freaking _short_. You’re both going to be dead before you hardly even notice. Only if you do this you’ll have an eternity of afterlife to look forward to her not speaking to you because she’s so mad.”

Percy snorted. “Geeze, you sound just like her.”

“It’s called not being an idiot,” Nico said. “I’m just doing what she told me to.”

"You're a hypocrite," muttered Percy. "I know you did the exact same thing. You would have made the soul exchange for Bianca if it your dad would have accepted yours."

Nico's eyes narrowed in suspicion. "How do _you_ know that?"

Percy faltered. In his outrage he'd forgotten that Nico had no idea he'd witnessed that particular moment in his history. Oops. Probably not the best time to admit he'd been privy to quite a few rather personal events.

"Easy guess," he covered, shrugging. "Of course you'd do that. I know you."

That claim seemed to get Nico's hackles up just as much as a confession of the actual truth.

"No. You don't. You don't know me _at all_ , Jackson."

Hearing Nico call him 'Jackson' instead of 'Percy' bothered Percy more than it should have. He couldn't pin down why but the sudden distancing stung.

"If that's true, then whose fault is that?" Percy retaliated. "There hasn't been a lack of trying."

Nico rolled his eyes in an unintentional impersonation of his dad. "Oh yeah, you've been trying _real hard_ ," he scoffed. "I've had _so many_ invitations to hang out from you guys the past three years. I practically had to hire a secretary to manage my scheduling."

"You ditched us and left no forwarding address!" yelled Percy defensively. "You made it very clear you didn't want us to find you! We _couldn't_ find you!"

"Funny, you had no trouble finding me when you _needed_ something."

Percy paused, thrown for a loop. There was actual hurt shining in Nico's eyes.

He hadn't really looked at it that way before. From the second the accident happened his brain had switched into mission mode. Annabeth's death was a problem. A problem he had to _solve_. And solving problems is what he and the other demigods did together. It hadn't really occurred to him that Nico wouldn't be willing to help. Nico always helped him in the past, even when from a distance it appeared to be against his best interests. And it's not like Nico hadn't run away from camp before...yet he always came back in time when the others needed him. He hadn't complained those other times about being left alone when he'd deliberately run away; everyone assumed that's how he wanted it. Nico liked being alone...didn't he? He'd thought he was doing what Nico wanted by not bothering him. If Nico had actually wanted to hang out with them...why had he left? Why hadn't he said something?

"Actually...I had quite a lot of trouble finding you," Percy said, more subdued. "It took me three months. I got lost a bunch of times."

"Whatever," muttered Nico.

"You shouldn't have left camp," Percy said. "Nobody wanted you to leave. You should come back."

"B.S." snapped Nico. "I did everyone a favor by leaving. Don't even try to pretend otherwise."

"Well I can't speak for _everyone_ ," admitted Percy. "But _I_ didn't want you to leave." He tried to channel as much sincerity into his words as he could manage. It suddenly seemed very crucial to make Nico believe him. He hated thinking that Nico actually thought he cared that little for him.

"L-liar," sputtered Nico, inching a little bit away from Percy. Being stuck on a branch didn't give him a lot of space to work with. "Shut up."

"I mean it," said Percy. "I was really unhappy when you bailed."

Was it Percy's imagination, or was Nico blushing? Was it even possible for someone like Nico to blush? Probably not. It was probably just the warm glow of river water catching on his face. Yeah, that was it.

"Yeah. Well." Nico coughed. "It's not like I wanted to go. I just had to do what I had to do though. You know. Reasons."

"What reasons?"

Nico suddenly became fascinated in watching a line of ants dismantling a nearby leaf. "Oh you know," he said distractedly. "Stuff. Things to do. Places to see. That kind of stuff."

"Uh huh," said Percy, not buying the vague response and feeling mildly irked that Nico wasn't telling him.

"Saw a lot of places you really would have liked," continued Nico, finally sparing Percy a quick glance before going back to his ant observing. "You should let me take you to a few."

"I can't, I need—"

"Time isn't very relevant in the Underworld," Nico cut him off. "A few days seeing some stuff isn't going to make a difference to anyone down there.  You shouldn't rush into what you're trying to do."

Percy stared at Nico, and then afforded their surroundings a long sweeping glance. He'd never been anywhere this tropical before. Light shone through huge fronds of leaves, tinting the air around them emerald. Echoes of Insects and bird calls resonated around them, louder than any he'd heard before. The water was mysteriously opaque, but not in the same way that ocean water was. Nico was right. It _was_ pretty cool.

"Uh..." said Percy, thinking long and hard about the suggestion. "Maybe."

Nico looked up at him and almost-smiled.

Percy felt slightly lightheaded.

"Maybe just...just one or two. If we don't' take very long."

"Okay," said Nico. His almost-smile turned into an actual-smile, albeit a subtle one.

Percy's lightheaded feeling got worse. It was probably the heat. He wasn't used to tropical climates.

"Um," he said. "Where did you have in mind?"

"I'll surprise you." Nico grinned. Then yawned. "Just...give me a few minutes. I need to rest. That was a long jump."

Percy nodded, wondering if there was a way to get from the branch to the shore in the meantime. Their current whereabouts didn't seem like the best location for a proper rest.

"Just a few minutes," said Nico, stifling another yawn. "Then..." his eyes started to droop and his head jerked as if suddenly waking up from dropping off. "Twenty minutes," he said. "I'll be good in twenty."

"We can wait longer than that if you need to," said Percy in concern. "Maybe we should—"

Nico's eyes slid all the way shut, and his body swayed dangerously sideways. Percy managed to catch him before he fell all the way off the branch.

"—Get off this branch," Percy finished to his unhearing and utterly passed out friend.

"Well this is awkward."

Percy carefully contemplated what to do. He supposed that if he were very cautious, he could prop Nico up where the branch intersected with the trunk of the tree. But Nico wouldn't be very stable while unconscious. What if Percy got distracted for a second, and in that moment Nico rolled off? He was so deeply asleep that Percy wasn't sure he'd wake up, even from the shock of hitting the water. If Nico fell he could drown. Not to mention the fact that Percy could sense piranhas and barracudas skimming beneath the water’s innocent looking surface. And who knew what type of ancient river monsters might be lurking there as well? A brief oversight could spell Nico's death. The Amazon was not a good place to nod off unguarded.

Percy decided it was safer to just keep holding him until he woke up. He didn't really mind.

Actually he was kind of taken aback by just _how much_ he didn't mind.

Sitting there with his arms looped protectively around his friend's thin chest (thin, but not frail—Percy was surprised by just how toned Nico felt beneath his black skull motif T-shirt) he felt calmer than he had in weeks.

This...was kind of nice. Right this second he didn't have to feel guilty for just sitting here, enjoying the exotic scenery. Nico _needed_ him to be sitting here. Without him sitting here, something terrible might happen to his friend. And so the constant nagging guilt of inaction temporarily faded. He didn't have to feel bad that he was taking a break from trying to fix his problem. He was fixing someone else's problem. That was okay.

Percy smiled faintly. It was good having Nico around again. He hadn’t been lying when he said he’d been unhappy that he’d left. He’d missed him, and it had bothered him that Nico had taken off without a proper goodbye or explanation. He’d never been able to shake the nagging suspicion that he’d somehow done something to offend him.

A twinge of guilt interrupted his sense of calm.

_Now you’re the one that’s going to leave_.

_I don’t have a choice though._

_Yes I do._

_There’s only one right choice though._

_Is there?_

_It doesn’t matter, he won’t care anyway._

He looked down at the sleeping teenager in his arms. Nico was going through a surprising amount of trouble because of him. It didn’t really make sense. In spite of Nico’s objections, Percy was still convinced that he’d had a crush on Annabeth. It had just been written too blatantly in his expressions and actions over the years. Percy might not consider himself the sharpest lure in the tackle box, but he could certainly recognize jealousy when he saw it—Nico had been practically dripping with it. He’d blamed that for the strain between them all this time; those kind of uncontrollable toxic feelings were a heavy burden to add on top of the misunderstanding about Bianca. Percy was always surprised when Nico proved that they were actually still friends. But in spite of their rocky friendship status, Nico _ought_ to want Annabeth to be around more than Percy. Why on earth was he trying to stop Percy from making the trade? Incomprehensible. Nico was perpetually mysterious.

Mysterious, but a really good guy. If it wasn’t possible for him and Annabeth to be together right now…well, the thought hurt, but thinking of Nico being there for her hurt less than thinking about her with anyone else. He really seemed to love her.

They’d be really good together. They’d be happy.

Percy wished he’d be able to be around to see them happy.

Come to think of it, he could probably count the number of times he’d ever seen Nico happy on just one hand. And it’s not like he was _naturally_ so unhappy. The first time he’d met the guy he’d been downright radiant with enthusiasm. It was a freaking tragedy he’d ended up so tortured.

But that was going to get better soon. The world would be a better place because Annabeth would be back in it. And for that same reason Nico would be a happier guy. Percy felt pretty good about his decision. He’d just give it a few days, because for some reason showing him a bunch of places seemed really important to Nico, and if he could do one small favor for him as thanks for all the stuff Nico had done, well, that wasn’t a bad thing. But then he’d call on Hades again and make the trade of souls for real. And then Annabeth will be alive, and Nico will be happy, and everything will be great.

…Except for the minor inconvenient detail of being dead himself.

But Nico can come and go in the Underworld as he pleases. Maybe he would visit Percy? The prospect of being dead became a lot less depressing if he thought about Nico keeping him company from time to time. That really wouldn’t be so bad. He’d have to remember to ask Nico if he would do that before going through with the trade. Hopefully he wouldn’t mind.

Percy tightened his grip on Nico and smiled. Yeah, he totally had everything all worked out. He felt so much better.

* * *

 

It was hard to wake up.

Nico couldn’t remember the last time he’d felt this comfortable. Which was kind of weird, because he was pretty sure he hadn’t fallen asleep in his bed. He’d thought he was someplace that ought to have been hard and rough, very specifically _uncomfortable_ , to the extreme. But that couldn’t be right, he was on top of something…not _soft_ per see, but just…well. He was on top of something kind of perfect feeling, whatever it was. And something was rhythmically running through his hair in a way that felt seriously _amazing_. Hopefully he didn’t actually need to be anywhere any time soon, because his willpower to move was pretty much sitting at nil.

Hang on.

Memory of where he’d last been slowly broke through his sleepy haze.

_Percy_.

Nico cracked open an eye, and was blinded by a field of tangerine cotton.

…The exact shade of orange Camp Half-Blood favored for their uniform T-shirts.

Nico’s face was very intimately mashed into a Camp Half-Blood T-shirt.

There was only one person that T-shirt could possibly belong to.

_Why am I sleeping on top of Percy?!_

Nico sprang backwards, scrambling away.

…Or tried to. His escape was thwarted by the unexpected presence of strong arms wrapped around him.

Nico’s sanity imploded.

“GET OFF!” he screamed, thrashing wildly.

The loud and violent awakening apparently caught Percy by surprise. He jumped a little and let go.

Nico flung himself off the branch.

“Nico!” He heard Percy call after him, briefly, before the water rendered him deaf.

His vision turned brown. No more air. Better. Much better.

_Maybe I’ll just go ahead and drown_ , thought Nico. _That would definitely be an acceptable solution to this situation. I can’t go back up there. Not if it means facing Percy after_ that _._

Whether he was actually serious about his plan for drowning or not, Nico wasn’t given a say in the matter. Only seconds passed before a crashing disturbance interrupted his watery free-fall. Percy grabbed him and hauled him out.

“Nico!” Percy cried again, hovering over him worriedly. “Can you breathe?”

For a second it looked like he was seriously planning on doing CPR.

For half a second Nico actually considered _letting_ him.

Then his sanity returned, and with it the familiar self-loathing for even letting his mind stray in such a place for a moment. Gods he was such a horrible person. Percy really should have left him underwater.

“You didn’t have to jump in,” he said ungratefully. “I can swim.”

“You weren’t moving.” Percy’s look of relief ebbed into a frown.

“I was just startled,” grumbled Nico. “I would have gotten out in a minute.”

“Well I didn’t want to wait. There are piranhas and barracudas and anacondas and stuff down there. It was too dangerous to leave you in. Even for a minute.”

Nico waved the explanation off with a pish-poshing hand gesture. “I thought you were Mr. Marine-expert,” he scoffed. “Those things rarely attack people. I’m not worried about it.”

Percy’s frown deepened. “They’re attracted to shiny objects,” he said. “You’re practically covered in metal stuff. You look like an all-you-can-eat piranha buffet to me. And—” Percy trailed off.

“—And what?” Nico didn’t like the way he’d sounded when Percy had cut himself off.

“Nothing. You just seem a little extra high risk for getting attacked.” Percy looked uncomfortable.

“What else were you going to say? I’m not covered in _that_ much metal: just my ring and my belt. My sword isn’t even shiny.”

“Uh,” said Percy. “Well they’re also attracted to the smell of blood.”

“I’m not bleeding.”

“Yeah,” Percy agreed.

“So _why_ would that make me high risk?” Nico demanded.

“Uh well. It was…just something I remembered one of the pegasi saying one time. It’s nothing.”

_I hate pegasi_ , thought Nico irritably. “What. Did. It. Say.”

“That-you-smelled-like-dead-things,” Percy said quickly with a gulp. “I was just worried that it would seem like the same thing to the fish. I didn’t want to risk you getting attacked.”

Of course.

Of course Percy saw what a freak he was too.

Percy was so overly nice that he was good at hiding it. He’d actually managed to fool Nico into thinking that he didn’t see him the same freakish way that everyone else did. He’d made it easy to forget that he was actually a creepy outcast that didn’t belong around normal functional people. It had been nice to forget for a bit. But forgetting wasn’t good for him. It just made the realization all the more cruel and painful when it came back to smack him in the face. He should never let his guard down and trust people this much. It’s a mistake.

Nico snapped around and began stalking away. He actually wanted to _run_ away, but didn’t want Percy to witness him being that weak. He was going to force himself to remain calm and dignified until out of Percy’s sight. Then he could completely freak out the way his brain was screaming to let him.

“Nico, wait!” yelled Percy. “I didn’t mean to offend you! You smell totally normal to _me_! It was just a stupid comment by a stupid pegasus! It was probably crazy! I just didn’t want to take any chances!”

_Don’t listen. Don’t look back. Don’t believe him_.

“Nico!”

The problem with forcing yourself to stalk away with dignity was that it made it really easy for other people to catch up with you. Percy had no reservations with running and tackling him.

“Get off me!” screamed Nico, struggling to pull free of Percy’s death grip on him.

“No!” Percy tightened his hold on Nico’s wrists. “Don’t you dare run away from me! Why are you taking everything so personally? I was just worried about you!”

“Save your worry for someone else, who won’t contaminate you with their freakishness!” Nico yelled back. He tried again to wrench free, to no avail.

“There’s nothing freakish about you! What’s your problem?”

“My problem is that _everything_ about me is freakish!” Nico spat.

“That’s ridiculous! You’re not a freak, Nico. You’re awesome.”

“And you’re a lousy liar. Leave me alone.”

“Seriously, Nico. Where is this self-esteem thing coming from? I’ve watched you kick major butt in battle more times than I can count. You’re badass.”

“You’re Percy freaking Jackson,” Nico muttered. “You’re genetically obligated to say stuff like that. If you said something that wasn’t nice, the Earth would probably combust. It’s meaningless. Leave me alone.”

“Dude, you have issues,” said Percy.

“Duh,” snapped Nico. “That’s the most intelligent thing you’ve said all week.”

“You don’t have to be such a jerk!”

“Yeah,” snarled Nico. “I do. It’s like a Hades thing. I signed a contract. I’m obligated to be a freakish jerk. It would throw the universe out of whack if people actually started _liking_ my side of the family. Gotta do my duty.”

“Well you’re doing a _great_ job!” Percy finally lost his temper. It was mildly gratifying to know he could affect him that much, even if it was a bad affect. “I especially like the part where you’re about to abandon me in the middle of the jungle. I don’t have any way back to camp if you leave. Really swell of you.”

_He’d said back to camp. Not back to Nico’s place. He really did want to be rid of him._

A throbbing hollow ache opened up in Nico’s chest. He squeezed his eyes shut, trying to shut it out. The sensory depravation only made it’s internal throbbing all the louder.

“I’ll take you back to camp,” he gritted out.

“Good,” said Percy. “Then I can go on with the exchange. I don’t know what I was thinking, agreeing to stall anyway. I need to follow through.”

“No.” In his blind rage, Nico had actually forgotten about what Percy was planning to do. He shouldn’t have lost control. He’d been making progress on talking Percy out of it. He’d just ruined everything. “No, Percy. You _can’t_.”

“I have to,” said Percy stoically. “Take me back to camp.”

“If you insist.” Nico shoved Percy into a shadow.

* * *

 

This time, the cold of the shadow travel didn’t leave them as they exited. Percy stepped out into arctic brightness.

“This isn’t camp,” he stated the obvious. “You said…”

“I said I’d take you back,” Nico said smugly. ”I didn’t say when. I’ll bring you back _eventually_.”

“Nico!” Percy stamped his foot. “Take me back _now_!”

“Can’t.” Nico shrugged. “Traveling this far wears me out too much to do it immediately. I’m going to have to rest again before I can take you anywhere.”

“Nico—arrgh!” Percy dragged his hand across his eyes in frustration. “What were you _thinking_?”

_That letting you die is unacceptable. That it would shatter me. That you’re blind for not realizing that. That if I’m not a good enough reason for you to stick around then I’m not going to give up until I find you another one._

“I was thinking that Iceland is lovely this time of year.” Nico shrugged.

“There’s snow on the ground.”

“Yeah.”

“You’re dripping wet.” Percy gestured at Nico. He himself was utterly dry.

“Eh.” Nico wasn’t particularly concerned.

“…And only wearing a T-shirt,” Percy continued to nag, not bothering to acknowledge that he also was only wearing a T-shirt.

“It was too warm for my jacket back in the States,” Nico shrugged again. “You didn’t exactly give me enough warning to pack a suitcase.”

“You didn’t have to take us to a glacier!” Percy yelled. “You’re going to get hypothermia!”

“I’m pretty resilient,” Nico said flippantly.

“You’re starting to turn blue.”

_Excellent_ , thought Nico. _Maybe if I’m your favorite color you’ll actually listen to me_.

“Hold still,” sighed Percy. He made a gesture with his hand and water poured off Nico. In about a minute he was dry too.

“Thanks,” said Nico.

“Yeah, well, too bad I can’t do that and make a coat magically appear,” complained Percy. “’Cause you’re still going to get hypothermia.”

“Nah,” said Nico. “We’ll be checked into a room before that can happen.”

“Huh?” Percy swung around, noticing for the first time the ski-lodge themed hotel that was behind them. “Oh,” he said.

“I was thinking I could take a nap, and meanwhile you could, you know, check out the geothermal spa. There are some really good hot springs out back.”

Percy balked.

“Oh, um.” He frowned.

“What?” asked Nico.

“Oh, ah, nothing,” said Percy, still looking very disturbed.

“You don’t like hot springs?”

“I don’t like spas,” Percy clarified. “In fact I kind of hate them.”

Nico found this very hard to comprehend. He’d taken Percy here because it was one of the nicest aquatic destinations’ he’d personally set foot in. The water around them was a soft pure turquoise of the kind of quality one usually only saw in Photoshopped travel brochures. Chunks of ice littered the ground like boulder-sized diamonds. He’d thought Percy would love it.

“Who doesn’t like spas?” asked Nico, incredulously.

“Er…lots of people?”

“Well I’m sure lots of people _say_ they don’t like them, because you know, it probably sounds more macho or whatever,” said Nico. “But I kind of assumed that even those people still secretly liked them deep down anyway. I mean, what’s not to like, spas are _nice_.”

“The last time I was in a spa I got turned into a guinea pig,” explained Percy. “It’s a pretty bad memory.”

“Oh,” said Nico. “Yeah, I guess that’s a pretty good reason then.”

“Can’t say I’m a very big fan of guinea pigs anymore either.”

Nico made a mental note to cross off any return trips to South America.

“Er, well,” said Nico, thrown off a bit by Percy’s surprising reaction. “I can’t take us very far, but I could probably mange a short trip. We can find someplace else down the mountain….”

“No, this is fine,” said Percy. “You should rest, you don’t look so good.”

“I’m _fine_.”

“No, we’re staying here.” Percy pushed Nico towards the lodge. “I’ll suck it up. Let’s get out of the freaking cold.”

As they walked through the entrance, Percy balked again. He didn’t mean to, he just hadn’t expected to nearly walk into a troll.

“Don’t stare,” whispered Nico. “She hates that.”

“Uh, hi.”

“Ah! Hello!” At the sight of Nico the troll broke into a wide toothy grin. She hugged him enthusiastically. “Mr. di Angelo! It has been a while, has it not? And you have brought a guest! This is first. How deliciously handsome he is.”

Percy squirmed slightly, assuming that she meant ‘deliciously’ in the actual sense rather than figurative.

“It is someone _special_ , might I ask?”

Nico turned bright crimson, something Percy had definitely never witnessed before. Since he’d been warned not to stare at the troll he overcompensated by staring at Nico instead. It only seemed to worsen Nico’s hue.

“No!—ah, I mean, yeah he’s special. But not like—I mean—” Nico cleared his throat. “This is Percy. My _friend_.”

“So you’ll be requiring a suite with _two_ beds then.”

“YES! _Obviously_.” Nico put his hand over his eyes.

“Ho. No need to look so abashed.” She thumped Nico on the shoulder. “You are such a funny human. Come this way.”

Percy and Nico shuffled after her and were led into a small but cozy room. There were fluffy down comforters topped with reindeer hides on the beds. Nico happily collapsed onto one.

“Help yourself to complimentary beverages,” the troll chattered cheerfully at them. “You’ll find them in the mini-fridge. Dinner is ready at six, if you wish to partake. Our prices have not changed.”

Nico nodded at her, although his eyes were already closed. Percy highly doubted he’d be awake at dinnertime.

“Hey Nico,” he whispered, once the troll had left. “How are we going to pay for this? I have hardly any money on me. And definitely not Icelandic money.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Nico sleepily waved him off.

“I don’t want you to go broke on my account,” Percy persisted, despite the fact that Nico had essentially kidnapped him.

“Oh, I won’t. She accepts payment in rocks. It’s really not a problem for me to accommodate.”

“Ah. That’s convenient.”

“I know, right?” Nico yawned. “I love this place.”

Percy was still pretty irritated with Nico, but he smiled in spite of that. All the times that Nico had been absent from camp Percy had simply assumed he was strictly in the Underworld, doing stuff like training and plotting. That Nico actually went places and did things for the sake of enjoying himself was a revelation. Percy had kind of assumed that Nico wasn’t capable of enjoying himself anymore. He was glad to be wrong.

Also—the troll lady—her obvious affection towards Nico reminded him of Bob. This filled Percy simultaneously with both warmth and guilt. Nico had a consideration for monsters that Percy kept meaning to try and emulate, but he wasn’t quite there yet. He had trouble overlooking the fact that most of them were usually trying to kill him.

“I guess maybe I will check out the springs after all,” said Percy, feeling mildly more positive towards their surroundings than he had a few minutes ago.

Nico didn’t answer. He was already sound asleep.

* * *

 

Okay, so Nico was right. Spas were actually pretty nice when you subtracted psychotic sorceresses from the equation. Percy had never been to one before visiting Circe’s island and he certainly had never bothered to try one again since, so that had previously been his only experience.

Despite the cold air temperature, the water in the spring stayed perfectly warm, feeling all the nicer for the contrast of the wind chill. The scenery from their glacial mountaintop was gorgeous, and there weren’t many people about due to the resort’s seclusion. (Or possibly due to the fact that a troll managed it, although the Mist ought to have taken care of that being a problem.) 

Percy spent some time swimming around, exploring the rocky underwater habitat. There weren’t any fish living in the spring though, due to the high water temperature, so he eventually got bored with that and just found a comfortable place to sit and enjoy the pleasant feel of the water and the peaceful atmosphere. He could easily have stayed there for hours.

* * *

 

Nico was smiling.

"I have something to tell you."

The words filled Percy with an overwhelming sense of elation. _It's about time_ , he thought. _I knew he was keeping important secrets. He's finally forgiven me for whatever I did wrong. Nico trusts me._

"Annabeth and I are getting married." Nico dropped the bombshell. "Will you be my best man?"

Percy gaped. "What?"

"I want you to be the best man at my wedding," repeated Nico. "You'll do that, right?"

Percy nodded dumbly.

"But isn't Annabeth dead?" Percy finally hesitated to ask.

"Not anymore," Nico answered, giving Percy a suspicious look. "We fixed that, remember?"

Percy looked down at himself. His skin was missing. _Everything_ was missing. The bleached glare of bones peaked out from beneath his tattered T-shirt. It wasn't a T-shirt for long though. He was wearing a tux. It was an improvement; a well-tailored suit made his skeletal remains look almost elegant compared to his old clothes. This was right. He belonged like this.

Speaking of elegant, he almost didn't recognize the young man standing next to him now. Nico looked amazing. Percy had never seen him in formal wear before. His suit was sharp and fit him perfectly, complimenting his wiry build rather than drawing attention to his usual malnourished look. His overgrown and typically neglected hair was combed and impeccably in place. He looked rested. A single calla lily was pinned to his lapel.

"Wow, Nico. You look—"

Organ music cut him off.

"Here she comes!" Nico elbowed Percy excitedly. Everyone in the dark obsidian hall turned to watch as a troll in a voluminous black dress began to walk down the aisle. A crown of bones ringed her disconcertingly black hair.

"Nico, that isn't Annabeth," Percy whispered in alarm.

"Of course that's Annabeth," retorted Nico. "We couldn't get her old body back. This was the best we could do. But I don't care, I'd love her in any form."

Percy's heart felt like it was being shredded by a hundred ravenous empousai. Which didn't make sense; he didn't have a heart anymore. Besides, isn’t this what he had wanted? All his plans were working out.

 The troll (Percy still was not convinced it was Annabeth,) walked right by Percy without a glance as if he were invisible.

He heard a rustling sound, and Luke Castellan stepped out from behind a blood-red curtain. He was dressed like a bishop and winked mischievously at Percy.

"We're gathered here on this joyous occasion to join Nico di Angelo and Annabeth Chase in holy matrimony," announced Luke. "Does anyone have any objections?"

The room was silent.

"I do!" Percy couldn't stop himself.

A thousand disapproving faces all turned to stare at Percy. No, not a thousand, a million. Ten million. Ten billion. Every soul in the Underworld had been invited to the wedding.

Nico scowled at him. "Percy, you're embarrassing me!" he hissed.

"But you can't marry a troll, Nico!" Percy said desperately.

"I knew it," snapped Nico. He grew terrifying in his sudden anger. Or maybe it was the Helm of Darkness he was wearing. Percy somehow hadn't noticed it on his head before now. Nico looked just like Hades with it there to compliment his rage. "I knew you were too narrow-minded to ever accept me." Nico was yelling.

"I'm disappointed in you," sighed Annabeth the troll.

"I'm not narrow-minded—I just want what's best for—" Percy started to object but didn't get the chance to finish.

"You're the worst." Together, Nico and Annabeth pushed Percy into the River Styx. The water burned. Percy thrashed, trying to find his lifeline to hang on to. There was nothing there though. Everything was pain and blackness.

* * *

 

The burning didn’t stop when he woke up.

For a moment he couldn’t remember where he was. Everything was blue. Why could he see nothing but blue? Then he realized that he was underwater. He’d fallen asleep while sitting in the spring.

Percy pulled himself out of the hot spring, silently thanking his luck that he was a child of Poseidon. If he’d been anyone else he would have probably drowned just now.

While the water had seemed pleasantly warm when he first got in, it now felt suffocating. Percy was feverish and seriously contemplated jumping into a snow bank. He probably would have if the troll lady (he was going to have to ask Nico her name, after that disturbing dream he felt like a lousy person not knowing her as anything but ‘the troll’) hadn’t interrupted him.

“Ah, has the friend of Mr. di Angelo decided to cook himself? You look as toasty as a boiled crawfish!” She grinned. “You should not stay in the water so very long Mr. Crawfish, you might find yourself on the menu!”

Percy smiled uncomfortably. “It won’t happen again.”

“Your friend is already in the dinning hall,” she continued, oblivious to Percy’s discomfort (or perhaps buoyed by it, Percy wasn’t sure.) “Come, I’ll show you the way.”

Percy followed her, although he really wasn’t certain he was ready to see Nico just this moment. That dream had left him feeling horribly off-kilter. He sort of wanted to try and sort out exactly what it had _meant_.

It wasn’t the first dream he’d had about Nico. It wasn’t even the tenth. Percy had had lots of dreams about him previously. More than he could count. But all of the others had been less dream, more vision; they’d been shown to him for very obvious reasons. He’d seen with perfect accuracy things that Nico was actually doing, things that were relevant to his quests and actions. He hadn’t had any regular dreams about him. Not the type of nonsensical gibberish that came from the brain randomly firing off during the sleep cycle. This dream was definitely different than those other ones.

At least, it had _better_ be different. Percy partially went through with following the troll simply because he wasn’t going to feel easy until he’d confirmed with his own two eyes that Nico wasn’t standing on an alter wearing the Helm of Darkness. Obviously he couldn’t be, the mere fact that Percy was in his real body was proof that the dream was nonsense. But still. It had left Percy feeling so very uncomfortable that he wasn’t going to feel better until he’d seen Nico back in his jeans and T-shirt, hair still a disheveled mess, and infinite rage absent from his face.

Nico was stooped over a large bowl of something (it smelled like stew.) He still looked sleepy, but not as bad as when Percy had last seen him. Most importantly, he smiled when he looked up and saw his companion. Whatever had caused dream-Nico to hate Percy, real-Nico didn’t appear to share the sentiment. At least, not that he would outwardly give away. Percy breathed a sigh of relief.

“Hey,” he said, sitting down next to his friend.

“Hey,” Nico echoed back. “Liked the springs?”

“They were…very relaxing.”

A bowl of stew was deposited in front of Percy. Once the troll had retreated he leaned over and whispered, “Hey, what’s her name?”

“Marta,” answered Nico.

“Ah, cool,” said Percy. He’d been prepared to hear an impossibly complicated multi-syllable name that he’d never be able to pronounce, much less remember. He was relieved to be proved wrong. He could definitely remember ‘Marta.’  

They ate in silence for a while. Percy kept finding his gaze drifting up from his food and falling on Nico. He hoped Nico wasn’t noticing. He felt awkward, but he just couldn’t help it. That dream had seemed so _vivid_. While it was happening he didn’t question that Nico hated him. It had been a horrible feeling.

He’d been relieved to wake up and know that Nico was probably still the same Nico he’d come to Iceland with. He’d been relieved to wake up and find whole hands instead of skeletal bones. It was a relief to realize he was still alive.

Still being alive meant that Annabeth was still dead.

His relief made him feel guilty.

“Do I have food on my face or something?” Nico finally asked, after catching Percy staring for the umpteenth time.

“No,” said Percy, utterly embarrassed.

“So it’s just my actual face that’s messed up then, huh?” Nico muttered. “Figures.”

“No!” Percy quickly objected. “No way, your face is perfect.” Okay so maybe that was kind of a weird thing for him to tell another dude, but _dude_. He really preferred this version of Nico to the coiffed and cold matrimonial model. “Don’t ever change it.”

Nico started choking on his stew.

After Percy had whacked him on his back and Nico had caught his breath, he turned and gave Percy an appalled look. “Okay Pod Person,” he deadpanned. “What have you done with Percy?”

Percy shrugged. “You might want to drag the spring.”

Nico snorted and then cracked up. “I’m actually considering taking that seriously.”

Percy shrugged again, grinning. His grin slowly faded though, he still felt unsettled.

“Hey Nico,” he finally asked, tapping his finger nervously on the table. “This is gonna seem weird and out of nowhere, but do you have a girlfriend?”

For a fraction of a second, Nico looked panicked. Then a wave of indifference washed over him, leaving his expression emotionless and distant. Percy immediately regretted asking…or at least not easing into the question more organically.

“No,” said Nico curtly.

“Sorry,” Percy immediately apologized. He’d obviously just struck a nerve. “I assumed not, I just always assumed that if you had one you would have introduced us. But then I suddenly realized that I shouldn’t just take something like that for granted. I feel kind of bad I never asked before.”

“Well, I don’t.” Nico was staring down into his stew as if it contained all the secrets to the universe.

“I had this weird dream you were getting married,” explained Percy.

Nico looked up and blinked. “ _You_...had a dream...about _me_.” His voice was strained.

“Yeah. A totally weird one.” Percy nodded. “I just wanted to check and make sure it wasn’t true or anything like that. I’d hate to be the last one to find out.”

“I’m never getting married,” said Nico quickly.

That statement took Percy by surprise. Sure it had been hard to picture Nico with anyone in particular (mainly because he hadn’t been aware of his friend showing interest in anyone except for Annabeth, and she obviously was off the market,) but he’d still always assumed at some point Nico would meet someone. And when that happened…well, it was only natural they’d get married eventually, right? That’s what people did.

“Really?” Percy asked.

Nico nodded harshly.

“You shouldn’t be so adamant about that,” said Percy. “You’ll probably meet someone and change your mind.”

“It’s not something that’s going to work out for me.”

Nico wasn’t even looking at him now. Crap, what had he said wrong? Percy had just wanted to reassure him. He hadn’t said ‘I’m never getting married’ in a positive, self-assured sort of way. Not like if someone like Rachel Dare had made that statement. He’d just wanted to make Nico feel better since he’d sounded so unhappy. It’s not like he’d been lying, anyway. He couldn’t see why someone like Nico (talented, determined, nice,) was even single in the first place. It definitely couldn’t be a permanent condition. Why was Nico such a landmine of negative emotions?

“I’m sorr—”

“I’m not having this conversation with you.” Nico walked away, leaving half his bowl of stew untouched.

Percy felt like a jerk. Apparently that dream had gotten at least one thing accurate.

* * *

 

Percy had initially planned on insisting that Nico cut their visit short. He’d planned on putting his foot down and forcing Nico to take him back to camp so he could sort out some things and get more drachmas, then call on Hades. But now he felt too guilty for upsetting Nico. He didn’t especially want to permanently leave this plane of existence on such a bad note, ditching the one person who he might actually get a chance of seeing again in a bad mood. He hadn’t even asked Nico yet if he’d come visit him. If he asked now, the answer would probably be _no_.

For the first time it dawned on Percy that Nico’s issues went a lot deeper than being angry about losing Bianca and what Zeus had done to his mom. That look of panic that had flashed across his face at the drop of the word ‘girlfriend’ was something else altogether.

Had Nico had one before? Had something happened to her? Anything might have occurred in the past three years. Nico might have been engaged for all Percy knew. Maybe his girlfriend had died. Maybe Percy was being an insensitive prick by constantly bringing up his own dead girlfriend in front of Nico. He could be giving Nico daily flashbacks to some horrible experience. He really had no idea what was up with his friend. (Did he even deserve to call Nico that? Some ‘friend’ he was, not even bothering to ask what had been going on with Nico during the 3 years he was gone.)

Percy wanted to find out.

He resolved to tie up loose ends before making his soul trade. He was going to make sure he left Nico in a better place than where he’d found him. He’d make sure that _everyone_ was better off for the trade, not just himself and Annabeth. He wanted to see Nico happy when he left.

He was pretty sure Annabeth would agree with that intention at least.

And so he didn’t press Nico to take him anywhere. They stayed at the ice resort for four more days. They went hiking. They played backgammon (sort of. Neither of them actually knew how to play so they just made up their own rules and played on the fly.) Nico told Percy some harrowing stories about Underworld exploits he’d been on. Percy likewise told Nico about some of his more interesting quests.

Nico actually smiled a few times. Each time Percy caught him doing it he’d have a hard time tearing his eyes away, the sight filling him with a warm triumphant glow. But if he let his gaze linger too long Nico would notice, and when he did like clockwork the smile would evaporate.

Percy really wished that wouldn’t happen. It was so nice when he smiled. He wanted Nico to do it more. He wanted him to smile _at_ him, rather than in spite of him and around him. He wanted Nico to smile _because_ of him.

Wait, where did _that_ thought come from?

Percy felt uneasy. Which was turning into a pretty a common occurrence these days.

It was especially bad when they checked out the springs together (Percy hadn’t really expected Nico to agree, lounging about in a pool of water didn’t especially seem like his cup of tea. But Nico had surprised him, which was another thing turning into a pretty common occurrence.)

Yes, the springs were nice, but they definitely made Percy _very_ uneasy.

He told himself it was just because he’d had a bad dream the last time he’d been in them. It was probably just residual negative energy lingering here. He tried to tell himself that that was definitely the reason. Not the fact that seeing his friend without his shirt on made him feel a little bit odd. Or the fact that he kept getting a feeling like he was being stared at, yet no one was ever looking when he checked. It definitely couldn’t have anything to do with that. And it most certainly wasn’t because seeing Nico all wet reminded him of being in the Amazon which made him think of what it had felt like to hold him and that that was something that maybe he wouldn’t really mind all that much if he had to do again. No, those thoughts were all weird and totally irrelevant. It was definitely just that stupid dream putting his stomach in knots as he sat in the very relaxing atmosphere, utterly failing to relax.

_Stop it_ , Percy chided himself. _Just stop. Pretty soon you’ll be dead and you won’t be able to do stuff like this anymore. So just stop overthinking everything and enjoy yourself._

Nico seemed like he was enjoying himself (up until any point where Percy was obviously looking, and then the walls would slide up, his face going stony and vacant—in retaliation Percy was getting really good at periphery gazing.) About the fifth or sixth time Nico shut down Percy decided he’d had enough. He wasn’t sure why things kept getting so tense between them but he was getting tired of it. He was going to break the tension if it killed him (an actual risk with Nico involved.)

Percy casually put his arms up, reaching back like he was stretching. He grabbed a handful of snow and lobbed it at Nico’s head.

Nico sputtered. His face darkened. For a second Percy really thought he _was_ going to kill him.

Then Nico smacked his hand down, drenching Percy with an epic splash.

War had been declared.

They fought for a good forty minutes. It was like the old days, training at camp—just wetter and colder and with more novel scenery. The awkward thoughts faded behind the thrill of physical exertion and having someone who was actually a challenging opponent. Percy was in his element. He’d _missed_ this.

Nico seemed pretty into it as well. They wrestled/splashed/fought dirty, the play-fight culminating with Nico trapping Percy in a headlock. He was holding Percy underwater, fully aware that his friend was in no danger of suffocating.

Percy struggled, trying to get Nico to loosen his grip. He wasn’t really thinking about where his hands were going, his only thought was that Nico had to be ticklish _somewhere_ , and if he could hit the right place the death grip around his neck would go slack. He definitely hadn’t intended to let his hands drift quite so inappropriately south. For the record, in his chokehold position Percy couldn’t really see what he was doing. And Nico was fairly slippery. It was definitely an _accident_.

An unforgivable accident, apparently. Just like that the fight was over, along with any hope of salvaging the amicability of their afternoon.

Nico dropped him.

Nico got out of the water.

Nico wouldn’t look at him.

“Hey, I’m sorry!” Percy put his hands up in a surrender of guilt. “I really didn’t mean to do that!”

Nico didn’t seem to hear him.

Percy was left alone in the pool, wondering why he kept screwing everything up so badly.

* * *

 

After his misstep in the hot spring, Percy hadn’t really expected Nico to want to go anywhere else with him. Nico had seemed so put off that Percy had been expecting to be brought back to camp immediately. He wouldn’t have even been surprised to find Nico gone, and himself needing an alternate way home.

Nico was asleep (or pretending to be asleep more likely) when Percy got back to their room. When he caught his gaze hovering just a little too long on Nico, he forcibly ripped it away. Never mind that Nico couldn’t catch him this time; he didn’t want to do anything that would make him uncomfortable, asleep or awake. Which Percy was beginning to suspect constituted ‘everything.’ The longer they were together the touchier and touchier Nico seemed to get.

Had Percy been wrong? _Did_ Nico actually still hate him? He was trying not to care, but it was really starting to get to him. The more time he spent around the moody teen the more Percy found himself wanting to spend even more time with him. He really couldn’t help it. When Nico wasn’t busy being an exploding time bomb he was surprisingly good company. He’d even had fun a few times over the past few weeks they’d been together. When Annabeth died Percy had been pretty sure it wasn’t going to be possible for him to have fun ever again. Nico was doing a pretty good job distracting him.

_Distracting you to make you feel better or distracting you to ruin your plans?_ A faint voice in the back of Percy’s mind nagged as he started drifting off to sleep. _That guy usually has his own agenda. You don’t even know what it is. You trust your friends too easily, Percy Jackson._

* * *

 

This time he knew he was dreaming. He knew it because he was in Jason’s room, and he had absolutely no reason to be there. He knew it because Jason was looking right through him. Jason wouldn’t ignore one of his friends like that.

Nico was pacing around in stilted circles like a broken clockwork toy.

“Calm down,” Jason said reassuringly. “It’s going to be okay.”

“No,” said Nico. “No, no. It isn’t. No. It just—no.”

“It is,” said Jason with that flawless tone of self-assurance he managed to apply to pretty much all walks of life.

“What am I even doing,” muttered Nico. “I shouldn’t have come. I don’t even know what I’m doing.”

“I told you I’m always here for you. Anytime you need to talk.”

Jason’s smile was wide and genuine, dripping with understanding. How did he do that? If Percy had tried to smile at someone like that it probably would have come off as mockingly smart-ass. He’d never been jealous of Jason before, but the alien feeling was starting to creep up on him.

“I don’t want to talk!” Nico snapped. “I just! I don’t—I don’t—I don’t know what—” he ran his hands through his hair, pulling at it as he reached the ends. Then he flung his arms down in frustration. Fists balled at his sides as his shoulders hunched.

“You don’t have to talk if you don’t _want_ to,” said perfect Jason with perfect understanding. “I’m just glad you finally dropped in. Everyone’s been worried about you.”

“Oh stuff it,” muttered Nico. “Stop being so stupid-nice. You sound like freaking you-know-who.”

Jason’s eyebrows went up as if he wanted to say something but was weighing whether he’d get his face bit off for it or not.

“Don’t.” Nico swung his index finger threateningly at Jason. “Not a word. Don’t go there. Oh, Erinyes blast me, I shouldn’t have come. I’ll go—“

“Stop.” Jason reached out and intercepted Nico before his foot could reach a nearby shadow, pulling him into a hug. Nico made a show of struggling for a few seconds, then went slack. He pressed his head against Jason’s shoulder.

The sobs were almost inaudible at first. They slowly built up until Nico was visibly shaking.

“You should come by more often, Nico, seriously,” said Jason,  “I think it would be good for you.”

Nico shook his head.

“You already know what I’m going to tell you,” said Jason with a sigh.

“Shut up,” sobbed Nico. “Shut up, shut up, shut up.”

“Whatever’s wrong, I’m pretty sure it would help things if you tell him.”

“Easy for someone like you to say,” Nico sniffled.

“I know,” agreed Jason sympathetically.

“Everything’s messed up,” mumbled Nico. “I can’t believe how messed up this is. It’s not going to be okay.”

Jason didn’t have an answer for that.

* * *

 

Percy stared at the ceiling through the darkness.

_What a weird dream_. Where had all of that even come from? He had no reason to dream about Jason. He hadn’t even thought about anyone back at camp since leaving to find Nico. And Jason and Nico weren’t even friends. Why would he dream about the two of them together like that? It seemed almost as weird as the wedding dream. But it had been more realistic.

It had been a little _too_ realistic.

It had felt like those dreams he’d had a few years ago, the ones that had shown him Nico’s exploits with Minos. But he’d only had those dreams when Nico was far away; he was pretty sure he’d been dreaming things that Nico was doing in real time. 

Percy turned his head to verify that Nico was sound asleep in the next bed.

He probably shouldn’t have been surprised when he saw that Nico’s bed was empty. He was anyway though.

“Nico?” Percy called out to the empty room.

Percy considered for a moment getting up and checking to see if Nico had wandered down to another part of the hotel, or was perhaps outside walking the grounds. He didn’t bother though. Percy knew he wasn’t going to find him anywhere.

Nico was with Jason.

Nico and Jason were _friends_.

How had he missed that? Seriously, _how_?

They weren’t just regular friends either. They had obviously been _close_. There had been some sort of unspoken understanding hanging in the air between them in the dream. Nico hadn’t even told Jason what was wrong but he just seemed to _know_.

Jason knew Nico’s secrets. That hurt.

Nico had let Jason hug him and hadn’t shoved him off. He’d willingly cried onto his shoulder. That hurt the most. If Percy had hugged him like that Nico probably would have ripped his arms off.

It was a lot easier to stomach Nico's standoffishness, when Percy had been under the false impression that Nico behaved that way with _everyone_.

Why Jason? When had that happened? What was so horribly wrong that Nico had to shadow travel half way around the world, when he could have just talked to Percy instead? What was wrong with Percy that Nico wouldn't come to him?

And who was Jason referring to, that Nico needed to tell something?

Hades maybe?

_Or Percy?_

He felt slightly conceited for assuming the conversation might be about him, but Nico had just spent over a month of one-on-one time with Percy. He couldn't think of anyone else Nico might have a problem with. No one else had been around.

Did Nico already know what his dad's answer would be when Percy asked to make the trade? Was he holding back important information?

Had Percy done something horrible to him without realizing it?

Maybe it had to do with his feelings for Annabeth.

Or maybe it had nothing to do with any of those things. Maybe Nico had some terminal disease and only weeks left to live. He _had_ been looking increasingly sickly over the time they'd spent together. That thought set off a sharp twisting in Percy's gut.

Nico couldn't die. He just _couldn't._ Percy couldn't handle that. Not on top of losing Annabeth.

Percy had lost friends before Annabeth, of course. It was just a fact of life that when you're a demigod there's a good chance you and your friends will have a short life span. It's something you're supposed to just get used to.

But imaging something awful happening to Nico didn't make Percy feel the way he'd felt when Beckendorf died. Or Silena or Zoë. The panic eating at him was closer in ilk to how losing Annabeth had felt.

...That was kind of an interesting revelation.

It was probably just because they were spending so much time together. He was relying on Nico too much.  That's probably why Nico was upset. Nico was probably fine, but Percy was turning into too much of a burden.

Percy closed his eyes, trying to fall back asleep. He wanted to get back into that dream. He wanted to find out what else Nico was telling Jason. He needed to know what was _going on_.

Sleep wouldn't come.

Percy sat up. If he couldn’t get back into the dream then he was going to have to wait for Nico to come back.

It was at least another hour before Nico reappeared, emerging seamlessly from a dark corner. He didn’t immediately notice that Percy was awake.

“Hey,” said Percy.

Nico jumped. “H—hey.”

Percy switched on the light and they stared at each other in silence for a few minutes. Nico looked guilty, his face reminiscent of a kid that had just gotten caught doing something they shouldn’t. His eyes were also red and strained in the same way they’d been in Percy’s dream.

“Are you okay?” Percy finally asked.

“What? Of course I’m okay,” said Nico quickly. “Why wouldn’t I be okay?” He sat down on his bed and started pulling off his boots.

“You look kind of upset,” said Percy.

“Well I’m _not_.”

“Are you mad at me about what happened today?” Percy asked. “I’m really sorry. I should have been more careful.”

“No,” said Nico simply. It wasn’t completely clear if he meant ‘no, I’m not mad’ or ‘no, your apology isn’t accepted.’

“Are you mad at me about something else?”

“Of course not.”

“Then why’d you leave?”

“I had something to take care of,” Nico snapped defensively. “I actually had a life going on you know, before you crashed my house.”

“If there’s stuff you need to be doing you could take me with you,” Percy said. “I could help. Or just end this whole thing. You don’t have to be dragging me around like this.”

“Yes. I do.” Nico didn’t elaborate.

Percy got up and sat down next to Nico on his bed. The way Nico fractionally leaned away from him was not lost on Percy. And it hurt a _lot_. Apparently Jason was safe for hugging yet it wasn’t even acceptable for Percy to be in close proximity of Nico without even touching. _Why?_

“Are you still mad at me about Bianca?” Percy asked quietly.

Nico blinked. “What? No, of course not. I got over that. I know it wasn’t your fault. _You_ know I know that wasn’t your fault.”

“Then what is it? I can tell something’s bothering you a lot. You’ve been acting weird. And you act even weirder around me than everyone else. It’s obvious I’ve done something to upset you. I can’t for the life of me figure out what if it’s not about Bianca.”

Nico scowled and crossed his arms. “Acting weird? Well gee, lemme think. I’ve recently found out that one of my friends is dead. I’ve had to play death phone tag with said friend for over a month despite the fact she wanted to be left alone. Meanwhile my other friend is all gung ho to just chuck his own life away instead. Which is going to make exactly zero people happy if he succeeds. Not exactly your everyday run of the mill month. Of course I’m acting weird. You’re acting even weirder. The Percy Jackson I _thought_ I knew wouldn’t be gunning it for a permanent slot in the Underworld. Are you quite done interrogating me? I’m tired.”

Percy was a bit taken aback by how much Nico had to say and the obvious bitterness behind his words. His moodiness was about Percy’s plan for the soul trade? All of this really was about Percy…but not something he’d already done. Something he was going to do in the future. The near future.

“You’re upset about the soul trade,” he stated, just to be clear.

“Bingo, genius.” Nico rolled his eyes. “You seriously couldn’t figure that out? I’d have thought it was a bit of a giveaway when I smashed my own bathtub to stop you.”

Percy thought about that for a few minutes. “Why?”

“What do you mean _why_? What kind of stupid question is that? Why would I smash the bathtub? I kind of value my friends’ lives more than a sedentary bathroom fixture. Do you think so little of me that you wouldn't expect me to care? Thanks for the vote of confidence. I don't know why you even came to me for help if you think I don't give a damn.”

“No, no, that's not what I meant," Percy said in dismay. Nico was yet again taking everything he said the wrong way and twisting his words around. "Of course I know you care. I know you care a lot. It's just...I thought...wouldn’t you rather have Annabeth back?”

“No.”

“But…aren’t you in love with her?”

Nico turned his head away, but not before Percy caught the flash of pain in his eyes. “I’ve already told you the answer to that. Don’t you listen to people?”

“Not when their words don’t match their actions,” replied Percy. “You acted like you were in love with her.”

“Well you suck at reading people.”

“So maybe you should tell me more about yourself so I don’t have to misread you.”

Nico was silent for a long time. “You wouldn’t like anything I’d have to say.”

“Try me.”

Nico opened his mouth as if he were about to say something, but then closed it. He chewed on his lip. He stared down at his hands, only to seemingly notice some dirt under his fingernails, and dig at it with a fingernail from the opposite hand. Finally he sighed and said, “If you switch places with Annabeth, a lot of people are going to be devastated.”

Percy took that in. _Devastated_ was a pretty strong word. And yeah, he'd rather expected his mom to be devastated. And maybe Tyson too. And yeah, Grover also. But anyone else? Sad, sure, plenty of people would be sad, but not any sadder than they'd been over Annabeth or any of the other prematurely departed demigods. And Annabeth had left behind just as many important people as Percy would. It seemed like a pretty clean exchange. Percy rather expected his family and Grover to understand why he'd do this.

Nico still wasn't making eye contact. Was he counting himself in that list of potentially devastated people?

Percy was starting to suspect that he _was_. And that was just confusing. Nico could still come see him if he were in the Underworld. And besides, Nico had gone AWOL for 3 years. If he cared that much about Percy sticking around, why hadn't he stuck around himself? It just didn't make sense.

"You'd...be devastated?" He asked carefully.

"Would my answer to that have any impact on whether you go through with the trade or not?" Nico asked in a flat voice, clearly without a lot of hope that the answer would be yes.

"I...don't know," said Percy honestly. Of all the people he'd considered he might be hurting by his actions, Nico hadn't even made the list. Nico had wanted to get revenge on him. Nico had (he'd thought) been in love with Annabeth. Everything he'd assumed about his friend had implied that Percy's plan would be mutually beneficial. That this whole time Nico was harboring the exact opposite feelings he'd assumed would take a while to process.

Nico pulled his knees up to his chest and wrapped his arms around them. "I'd be wrecked," he said, staring at his knees instead of Percy. "Don't do it. It's not going to make _anyone_ happy. Not even Annabeth. You know it won't."

“I…I feel like I _have_ to.”

“You don’t.”

“I can’t just do nothing. I can’t live with myself if I just let her die.”

“You’re not letting her die, Percy. She’s already gone. You haven’t failed her, it’s not your fault she died.”

“If there’s something I could do to undo her death and I don’t do it, then I’m failing her.”

“You have a hero complex,” muttered Nico. “Usually that’s great, it’s one of your best qualities, but it’s really not helping right now.”

“You know how I feel.”

“Vividly,” agreed Nico. “Which is why I also know you’re _wrong_. Don’t do it.”

Percy was about to object again, but he caught a glance of Nico’s miserable expression. He still couldn’t quite wrap his mind around the fact that Nico’s misery stemmed from him.

“I’m thinking it over,” he said instead. “I can still wait a few days.”

“Good.” Nico shoved him lightly. “Then get off my bed. Shadow traveling is exhausting. See you tomorrow.”

Percy reluctantly climbed back into his own bed and switched off the light. He couldn’t sleep though. He spent the rest of the early morning hours staring at the dark shadow that was Nico. 

* * *

 

Breakfast was awkward.

Percy found he was still having a problem with wanting to observe his friend. He couldn’t help it. Nico had surprised him the night before and he wanted to sort out what made the other boy tick. He wanted to know exactly _why_ Nico was so worked up over Percy’s possible decision to trade places with Annabeth. It just didn’t fit with his preexisting mental picture of the guy. And so he stared as Nico poured milk over a bowl of oatmeal. He stared as Nico accepted juice from Marta. He stared as Nico pretended to read a newspaper that was actually in Icelandic. He stared as Nico gave up pretending not to notice and blatantly stared back.

That wasn’t a good or inquisitive stare Nico was returning him, though. No, Nico was definitely staring at him in annoyance.

Percy dropped his eyes down to his own bowl of oatmeal. For some reason it didn’t look as appealing as Nico’s.

He poked at it for a while, and the oatmeal didn’t become any more interesting than it had been when he first looked at it. He glanced back up again. Nico was still shooting stormy looks at him.

 “So where are we going next?” Percy asked to break the ice.

It worked and Nico immediately brightened. “Have I ever told you about the times I ended up in China by accident?”

Percy shook his head.

“Well I’m going to show you.” Nico held out his had to Percy, breakfast completely forgotten. “We’re going to Huanglong.”

* * *

 

Nico and Percy spent three days wading through gold and turquoise pools on a pine swathed Chinese mountain; on the second day of which they accidently tripped over a sleeping dragon who politely asked them to be more careful and avoid his tail. (Other nearby tourists took note of the two strange boys apparently talking to a fallen log.)

Next on Nico’s agenda was an archipelago in the Indian Ocean off the coast of Africa. Percy had never seen sand so white or water so brilliantly aqua. He didn’t complain when their stop there stretched out a few days longer than Nico had originally planned. There were lots of interesting fish to talk to and a rather intriguing band of Oceanids who showed Percy around. While Percy explored Nico sat alone on the beach, always seemingly in the shade, regardless of whether or not there was anything nearby to cast a shadow.

They visited several lochs in the Scottish highlands, and then a deep rocky gorge cutting through the south of France and spilling out into the Mediterranean Sea. They stopped over at a frigid lake in the Swiss Alps, and a pristine beach in New Zealand. Everything Nico showed him was lovely. But Percy was having an increasingly hard time paying attention.

He was losing his drive. He knew that Nico was just trying to distract him, and it disturbed him that the ploy was actually working. The burning feeling that he needed to be _doing_ something hadn't waned, but his conviction that what he was planning to do was the right thing was wavering. And he couldn't tell if it was wavering because he'd actually made a bad decision, or just because Nico was effectively convincing him he didn't want to die. He didn't want to make a decision for selfish reasons.

He shouldn't be stalling so much. If he did go through with the trade, then he was probably only hurting Nico more by drawing this out. And if he didn't do it soon he was going to lose his nerve. He couldn't let down Annabeth. He felt guilty that he'd even remotely managed to enjoy himself since losing her. Never mind that it had been a few months now since the accident. He shouldn't have even been capable of that. He felt like he'd betrayed her.

Of course now if he made the switch he was going to feel like he'd betrayed Nico instead. He was caught between a rock and a hard place. He didn't want to hurt anyone. But at least Nico would still be able to see him in the Underworld. He'd have to understand.

Percy made the mistake of mentioning to Nico that he thought he'd need to call Hades within the next day or two. He knew it was asking for trouble but he was no longer willing to just disappear on his friend without warning. He watched as the pleasant expression on Nico's face drained away.

“Oh,” said Nico in a deadened voice. He didn’t argue with Percy this time; he seemed to sense it would be futile.

“I have to,” said Percy for the ten-millionth time.

“Whatever,” mumbled Nico. His eyes were fixed on some distant point on the horizon.

“You’ll come visit me though, right?” asked Percy anxiously.

Nico was silent. His shoulders hunched. All this time Percy had pretty much assumed that Nico would ( _of course_ Nico would come see him in the Underworld, _of course_ ,) but suddenly he began to question that. Maybe he _wouldn’t_. Maybe he’d refuse just out of resentment that Percy hadn’t listened to him.

“Please?”

Funny, at the start of all this, Percy had been willing to trade places with Annabeth without even a second thought. Right now though his willingness was hinging rather desperately on Nico’s answer. To die (which would not actually solve his problem of being separated from Annabeth at all,) and then lose Nico on top of Annabeth was a much heavier burden than he’d initially signed up for.

He reached out and closed his hand around Nico’s wrist, fully expecting to be immediately shoved off. Nico didn’t move.

Slowly, Nico closed his own fingers over Percy’s. His grip was cool and vise-like. “As if you even have to ask,” he said hoarsely.

“Thank you,” said Percy sincerely.

Nico nodded, his gaze never leaving the horizon.

* * *

 

Percy hoped he was having a nightmare, because he didn’t want to accept that what he was dreaming might really be happening.

Nico stood in the middle of Elysium, his face wracked with obvious guilt.

Annabeth didn’t notice his presence right away; she was preoccupied making a miniature model of a building out of ghostly foam board.

“Hey Annabeth,” said Nico.

She set down her exacto knife. “Oh dear,” she said, looking concerned as she took in Nico’s uncomfortable expression. “Something tells me you’re not just here for a chat.”

Nico sighed. “Afraid not.”

“Has something happened to Percy?”

“Not yet.”

Alarm splashed across her face. “What’s happening?”

“Well…” Nico twisted his hands, obviously conflicted about what he was doing. “He’s going to kill me for telling you.” He sighed. “But you really ought to know what he’s planning. It kind of affects you.”

“Which is…?”

“He’s going to ask my dad to trade his soul for yours.”

Annabeth closed her eyes and pressed her palms against them. “That… _idiot_ ,” she said. “Your dad won’t actually _let_ him though, right?”

“I have no idea!” replied Nico. “I wouldn’t think so. But he can be kind of unpredictable. Technically the trade would be valid. Whether dad accepts it or not could kind of go either way on a whim.”

“You can’t let him do that! You have to stop him!”

“Believe me, I’ve been _trying_. There is nothing I’ve been able to say or do that would convince him otherwise. This is my last resort. He needs to hear it from _you_.”

“Hearing it from me isn’t going to do any good,” sighed Annabeth.

“Well I hope you have another idea then, because I’m all out.”

Annabeth glanced down at her unfinished prototype. “I don’t want to be alive again if he’s not still there. That would be awful.”

Nico nodded, a little too understandingly.

“I’ve got stuff to do down here. I don’t _mind_ being dead. I’ve got a lot of jobs lined up.”

“So tell him that,” said Nico.

“He’s not going to listen to me,” she lamented. “He’ll do what he thinks is for the best, regardless of if it’ll actually make me happy. Oh gods, he’s treating me like cake.”

“Huh?” Annabeth had lost Nico on that last comment.

“He’s treating me like cake,” she reiterated. “You know how it is when there’s two slices of cake, and someone offers you one?”

“That doesn’t happen to me very often.” Nico frowned.

“Oh, um, sorry. Bad analogy I guess. Anyway, one slice is always inevitably bigger or better looking than the other one.”

Nico shrugged. On the rare occasions when he was actually included in an activity like that, he was usually too excited to be offered the cake than to minutely scrutinize the pieces for differences.

“Well, when this happens it’s really obvious that Percy actually wants the bigger slice. But every time without fail he picks the smaller one. He just _assumes_ that because he wants the bigger slice I would too, so he takes the other one because he wants to be nice to me. But you know what? Sometimes I’m not that hungry. Occasionally I actually _want_ the smaller one. And then neither of us gets the piece we want; all because Percy just makes assumptions and tries to do what he thinks is best without asking me. Usually it’s cute because, you know, cake’s not actually all that important. But he’s treating my life like cake and that’s not cool.“

"Hm," said Nico. "Yeah that does pretty much sum it up."

"We have to stop him," Annabeth repeated again. "We have to. Doesn't he understand? It's not his fault I'm dead. But if he does that then it _will_ be my fault that he is! Doesn't he get that? I can't go through life knowing I killed him!"

"I don't think he's really thinking very far past the not-wanting-you-to-be-dead part."

"So make him think!"

"He won't listen to me. I've managed to stall him a while but he's bent on going through with it now."

"Do you think your dad would listen to me if I asked him not to do it?" asked Annabeth.

"He might. It would probably make more of a difference than him hearing it from me. He’d probably value the dead person’s wants over a living meddler’s."

"Can you tell him I want to talk to him?"

Nico nodded. "I'll set up an appointment for you. I'll rearrange his schedule if necessary."

" _Thank you_." Annabeth hugged him. "Thanks for warning me. And everything else. You're a really good friend, Nico."

The guilt on Nico's face intensified. He looked off to the side. "You might not say that if you knew the big picture," he mumbled.

"What?" asked Annabeth.

"Nothing. I really hope everything works out for you. I hope you’re happy."

Annabeth nodded, still looking confused. “I like what I’m doing here. And I know I’ll see him again eventually. Time doesn’t really bother me here like it did when I was alive. Things don’t ever feel urgent anymore. It’s very peaceful.”

Nico nodded again. “Yeah, I know that’s usually how it goes.” He hesitated, looking around at the lovely scenery of Elysium, looking at pretty much everything except Annabeth. “You…you do want him to be happy too, right?” he asked.

“Of _course_ ,” exclaimed Annabeth.

“I mean, you don’t expect him to spend the next seventy or eighty years grieving for you, right? You expect him to move on and actually live, don’t you? Even if…you know. Even if it means he meets someone else and stuff like that?”

“Nico!” Annabeth looked dismayed. “How can you even ask me that? I’m not that selfish. It was short, but I had a really good life. I want him to have a really good life too.”

Nico gave her a weak smile. “Good. That’s what I thought. Just needed to be sure.”

He scurried off before Annabeth could question him again.

* * *

 

 Percy was so angry that his bad mood actually woke him up. He jumped out of bed and started pacing around the room.

That traitor!

He couldn't believe this. All the time they'd spent together, Nico being supportive and gaining his trust. Only to turn around and stab him in the back.

_Of course_ Annabeth would be against the trade if it were presented to her negatively like that. Nico hadn't even attempted to talk her into agreeing.

The two people he most cared about beyond his family (wait, when had Nico made it all the way up to the top two bracket? That had sneaked up on him. Oh well, never mind,) were ganging up on him and he had no way to get to the Underworld fast enough to intervene. He wasn't even on the same continent as the entrance to the Underworld.

He kept pacing, knowing that Nico would return before Percy had any chance of heading him off. He pulled Riptide out of his pocket and passed the time weaving it through his fingers, still in pen form.

He was practically at Nico's throat when the other boy finally appeared.

"Uh oh." Nico didn't need Percy to say anything to realize he was in trouble.

"How. Could. You." Percy switched Riptide into sword form, pointing it at Nico's face.

"What?" Despite having his own sword on him, Nico didn't reach for it. He put his hands up defensively, feigning innocence. "Percy, what's going on?"

 "How could you go to Annabeth behind my back?"

Nico's eyes went wide. "I _had_ to. You're making—hey, wait. How do you know where I went?"

"I saw you talking to her in my dream," gritted out Percy.

" _What?_ "

"I heard your whole conversation."

"How do you know that wasn't just a dream?"

"You just confirmed it." Percy backed his sword off a little bit, but didn't put it away. "But regardless, my dreams about you are almost always accurate."

"Dreams? _Plural_?" Nico's hands began to shake. He dropped one down and gripped his sword, although he didn't draw it. His knuckles went white around the hilt. "You've been spying on me?" he asked hysterically.

"Not on purpose. Stop trying to change the topic. You're a traitorous rat."

"How much did you see?" Percy's accusation may as well have fallen on deaf ears. "How much do you know?"

"A lot," said Percy without thinking too hard about it.

"Oh gods," said Nico. "You know everything."

Percy nodded, still not thinking too hard about it. He'd seen Nico talking to Minos, to Bianca, to his dad. He'd witnessed the very personal scene of Nico finding out what had happened to his mom. That seemed adequately like 'everything' to Percy. He was too mad at Nico for his betrayal to bother analyzing why the other boy seemed to be growing increasingly upset. As far as Percy was concerned, he himself was the only one who deserved to be upset right now.

"All this time," Nico said in a shaky voice. "You're saying that you knew about my feelings for you this _entire_ time?"

"Wait—your what?"

Horror flashed across Nico's face as he realized that Percy _hadn't_ known. Until now. He opened his mouth, clearly trying to think of something to say but failing. He shook his head, panic blazing in his eyes.

Percy was dumbstruck. What Nico had just said couldn’t possibly mean what it sounded like…right?

Nico wouldn’t be freaking out if it hadn’t meant what it sounded like. Suddenly all those confusing idiosyncrasies in Nico’s behavior snapped into place and made sense.

Holy Toledo.

“Nico?” Percy’s heart was suddenly beating very fast. Which was weird because he was still pretty mad. But the confusion of this sudden revelation had shaved off the razor edge of his anger, making it more manageable. He felt more like yelling and less like having a sword duel. That was something at least. And he was definitely feeling something else other than mad but the emotion was too complex and scary for Percy to pin down exactly what it was. He wasn’t in a very good mental place for dealing with a shock like this and the ensuing feelings it generated.

“Nico?” Percy just repeated. “Uh, what—uh—what do you mean? Are you—?”

“I’m sorry.” The words were barely a whisper. Nico’s eyes were shut, apparently too terrified of Percy’s reaction to even look at him. It only required a single step backward for the shadows to open up for him. He dropped clean through the floor, disappearing within an instant.

“Nico!” Percy’s call was useless; Nico was gone before he’d even opened his mouth.

Percy dropped Riptide and the sword shrank down into a pen as it clattered on the floor, bouncing harmlessly and rolling against the wall. He dropped to his knees and slammed his hand against the shadow on the floor, knowing it would be useless but needing to do _something_.

“Nico, you jerk! Come back and talk to me!”

The shadows didn’t answer.


	3. Intervention

Nico didn't stop running. He didn't pay attention to where the shadows were leading him. All he cared about was _distance_. He wanted to get so far away from Percy that he wouldn't even be able to remember he existed. He wanted to scrub his mind clean of all his tormenting feelings and the memory of just how badly he'd screwed everything up.

Percy _knew_.

And he'd found out at the worst possible time ever. Nico hadn't had high hopes for how Percy might take the knowledge on a good day. Pity had probably been the best scenario he could have banked on. Maybe indifference. He hadn't really thought Percy would be disgusted, not deep down, but pity was bad enough. And those predictions had depended upon Percy finding out under good conditions, which he hadn't. Instead, Percy found out when he was already mad at him. Percy was madder at him than he'd ever seen. If there was anything that _would_ cause Percy to be repulsed and furious with him over the revelation, this was exactly it.

And it was his fault. He was such an _idiot_.

Percy was probably horrified right now. He was probably wishing he hadn't hesitated when he'd aimed his sword at Nico. He was probably vividly recalling every moment they'd ever casually touched and reading dubious intentions into it. Percy was probably running to a shower as fast as Nico was running away, desperate to wash off the contamination of every association he'd ever had with Nico. Percy must hate him. Percy probably hated him like he had never hated anyone.

Nico stopped running, but only because his eyes were too blurred with tears to see where he was going.

Running was pointless, anyway. There wasn't anywhere far enough he could go to soften the pain of having ruined everything with Percy. There was no point in running outward. Where he needed to go was _down_. Retreating to the Underworld might be predictable, but at least Percy couldn't easily get to him there.

* * *

 

Percy tried several times to reach Nico by Iris-message, but Nico wasn’t answering.

He called Blackjack. It took his trusty pegasus a while to reach him, but even an ocean wasn't enough to keep him away. Together they rode back to Manhattan where Percy stopped just long enough to pick up some supplies. Then they flew to Nico’s hideout, although Percy knew it was hopeless to check: Nico wasn’t going to go back there. Nico was hiding. Nico was hiding very specifically from _him_. There was no way he’d be going to any place where Percy would know to look for him.

Most likely Nico was in the Underworld. It was practically a given.

For lack of any other ideas, Percy rode Blackjack back to camp and tracked down Jason.

If Jason was surprised to see him, he didn’t show it.

“Hey Percy,” he said casually.

“Have you heard from Nico?” Percy asked, cutting right to the chase.

“Not in a while.” Jason’s face still didn’t betray anything.

“Can…can we go somewhere private?” Percy asked. “I need to ask you some stuff.”

Jason raised an eyebrow, and then nodded. He led Percy back to his cabin. “Okay,” he said, sitting down on the edge of his bed. “Ask away.”

“Is Nico in love with me?”

Percy felt slightly stupid saying the question aloud. The possibility felt far more concrete in his head but sounded kind of ridiculous when shared. He felt egotistical making an assumption like that. But really…what other conclusion could he draw? And Jason was obviously the person who knew the solid answer.

Jason frowned and took far too long to reply. “That’s a question you should ask Nico, not me,” he finally said.

“I tried asking Nico. He ran away before I could finish the question.”

“It’s not my place to answer for him.”

“But you do know the answer,” said Percy. Jason's lack of surprise at the question confirmed that. And as far as Percy was concerned his lack of denial confirmed that he'd been right.

Jason shrugged unhelpfully.

“Look, I _really_ need to talk to him. Do you have any idea where he is? Do you know how to contact him?”

Jason’s frown deepened. “No, I honestly don’t. I never see him unless he chooses to drop in, which isn’t often. Until recently I hadn't heard from him in years. I don’t have any way to get ahold of him.”

Percy dragged his hands through his hair in frustration. “I don’t know what to do! I _need_ to talk to him!”

“Is he going to like what you have to say?” asked Jason.

“Huh?”

“Is Nico going to like what you have to say?” he repeated. “He might have had a good reason for running away. You aren’t just tracking him down to force him to listen to something that will hurt him, are you?”

Percy blinked. He hadn’t actually planned out what he wanted to say to Nico. He wasn’t sure how he felt about the whole thing yet. Surprised? Yes. Disturbed? Not really. Flattered? Yeah, of course. Did he return those kinds of feelings? That was a precarious question to try to answer. Annabeth’s death still felt too raw and painful for Percy to be able to even consider anyone else in that kind of way. Except Nico didn’t feel like an ‘anyone else’ anymore. For the past few weeks Nico had really been an oasis in Percy’s suffering. Nico felt safe and familiar and jeeze, Percy was missing him like crazy. And his anger at him had burned out pretty fast. The more Percy dwelled on what he’d overheard, the harder it was to ignore Annabeth’s end of the conversation. Annabeth didn’t want to be brought back. He would actually hurt her if he went through with his intentions. Which really, he'd sort of suspected all along but hadn't been willing to believe. No matter how much his brain screamed at him to trade places with her, he now knew that he just couldn’t do it. That hard fact hurt a hundred times more than the fact that Nico had told on him. He was stuck with the crappy hand of cards he’d been dealt, and if Nico was now missing from the deck too, Percy didn’t even know how he was going to deal with it.

_I miss you, don’t run away_ , was the only thing Percy knew for certain he wanted to say. Hopefully that wouldn't hurt him. Would it?

He shook his head. “I don’t want to hurt him.”

“Wanting and doing are two different things,” said Jason. “You'd better not actually hurt him. If you do I will personally escort you to the edge of Tartarus and push you over.”

Percy gave Jason an evaluative look. "You're not joking."

"No," Jason confirmed. "The guy's had a hard time. He deserves to catch a break."

"You know, I've kind of been having a hard time lately myself," muttered Percy.

Jason looked at him with genuine empathy. "I know. I'm really sorry about Annabeth."

Percy sighed. "It's fine. I mean, it isn't actually fine. It’s the opposite of fine. But yeah. Apparently she's doing okay. Apparently being the one left alive is the worse end of the deal. Who'd have thought, huh?" He laughed humorlessly. "Well. If you hear from Nico, tell him I really need to talk to him okay? Tell him I miss him. Like, a lot, you know?"

Jason nodded. "Yeah, I'll tell him. You should know though that I don't really expect to hear from him any time soon."

"Yeah," said Percy unhappily. "That was my guess. I just don't know where else to go."

"Are you in love with him?" Jason finally ventured to ask.

"I don't know." Percy sighed. "My feelings are pretty complicated at this point."

"Maybe you should sort them out before you track him down," Jason suggested. "It might be better if you both take some time to cool down first. He'll probably take whatever you have to say better if you have a solid answer for him."

"We were having a fight though," said Percy. "He thinks I'm mad at him. He's going to assume the worst if I don't talk to him soon."

"Well maybe you should try talking to Aphrodite. She might help you sort your feelings out faster. Piper could probably get her to visit you."

"No, I don't want to get that many people involved." Percy frowned. "Nico wouldn't like that."

Jason's eyebrows raised, evaluating Percy's answer. He seemed to approve.

"I think you have things more figured out than you think," he said, smiling at Percy.

For some reason Percy's cheeks started burning.

"Uh, yeah, I dunno. I still haven't figured out how to find him."

“Try writing him a letter, maybe. You could give it to Mercury—erm, I mean Hermes. If he can’t to get it to Nico directly, then he'd at least be able to pass it on to Hades. I'm sure it would get to Nico eventually."

"Oh," said Percy. "Hey, yeah, that's not a bad idea." He brightened a bit.

“Good.” Jason beamed at him. “Let me know if you find him, okay? I kind of worry about him. He makes things harder on himself than they need to be.”

“Yeah, I’ve noticed. I’ll let you know.”

Percy felt marginally better as he left the Zeus cabin. Jason’s suggestion might not have been the fastest way to contact Nico, but it was hopefully likely to be effective. Plus, Nico might be more receptive to reading a letter than to talking face to face.

* * *

 

_Dear Nico,_

Percy paused and tapped his pen against the table several times. Was ‘Dear’ the right thing to say? Was it implying too much? Or too generic? He was overthinking this.

_I’m not mad._

Okay, so that opening was hardly a work of Shakespeare there, but Percy figured he’d better make that clear right up front. He was really worried Nico wouldn’t actually read the letter.

_It’s true I heard everything. That means I also heard what Annabeth said. I didn’t like hearing it but I’ve had more time to think now and I have to accept what she wants. It’s just hard. But I’m not mad anymore. Well. I’m still kind of mad at life for turning out like it did. But I’m not mad at you._

_I wish you hadn’t run away._

No, that sounded accusatory. He crossed that last sentence out. Immediately putting Nico on the defensive was not going to help his odds of the letter actually being read all the way through.

_Please don’t run away from me. I miss you. A lot._

Percy stared at his sheet of paper for a very long time. Now he’d gotten the facts down. All that was left to say were feelings. That was the hard part. And it didn’t help that his dyslexia made it hard to focus on his writing. He kept trying to re-read what he’d already put down but the words kept seeming to rearrange themselves as he stared. Focusing for too long gave him a headache.

_I admit I was surprised by what you said. But in a good way. It makes me happy._

_I_

‘I’ what? It was still hard for Percy to really nail down how he was feeling. There was too much interference from feelings not related to Nico. Grief. Injustice. Helplessness. He still loved Annabeth, obviously. But Annabeth was gone. How did he feel about Nico with all those things removed? It was hard to separate.

Nico was really important to him. Thinking about him made him feel warm and happy. Thinking about not seeing him again made his chest ache. He definitely had feelings for his friend. But…were they strong enough? He didn’t want to lead Nico on.

_I’m not good at writing letters and I’m kind of messed up right now. (Stating the obvious.) I hope you can be patient with me while I work some stuff out. I know I’ll work it out faster if you’re around. I want to talk to you in person. I know I already said it but I miss you. Please come back? I’m at Camp Half-Blood for now. If you don’t come I don’t know how long I’ll stay. I’ll understand though if you don’t want to see me._

_I hope you do though._

_Love, Percy_

Percy agonized for a while over his sign off. Using ‘love‘ felt dangerous. But anything else felt insincere. ‘Love’ was the standard way he would sign a letter to anyone really important. In the end he had to go with sincerity, and ‘love, Percy’ was the only thing that felt right. So. Hopefully Nico wouldn’t read more into that than Percy meant. Or maybe it would be good if he did. Maybe Percy fully meant it that way, and not just in the kind of context he meant when he wrote a letter to his mom. He wished he were totally sure. He felt like he would be sure if he could only see Nico again. He just needed to see him without his anger and Nico’s walls in the way. He hoped Nico would give him the chance.

Now he just had to find Hermes. He set off for the nearest _Hermes Express_ office.

* * *

 

Nico was keeping himself busy. He had to, because if he slowed down enough to let his mind wander it wasted no time in torturing him with memories of Percy’s face all twisted up with anger and hurt and betrayal. And then it would further torment him with thoughts of how Percy’s reactions were valid and wow, he really did deserve Percy hating him, who was he even fooling. He was glad he hadn’t looked at Percy after slipping up and confessing. The horror that must have been on his face would have killed him.

And so the only way Nico was functioning was by running himself so ragged that he was too tired to think. It was hard to dwell on self-pity when an animated skeleton was charging at you with an iron blade. Nico was doing a lot of training. And when he wasn’t training he was sleeping because training for hours on end was exhausting.

Percy’s letter was delivered promptly to Nico’s residence.

Unfortunately Nico’s residence held other residents aside from Nico. And as Nico was not expecting to get any mail he wasn’t checking the mailbox in front of his dad’s palace. He was too busy training with the skeleton warriors to keep his mind off his problems to notice things like a deliveryman slipping a narrow envelope into the mailbox.

Hades noticed though.

The god of the Underworld discreetly meandered over to the mailbox and inspected its contents. Upon reading the return address on the letter for Nico he frowned disapprovingly. Percy Jackson was not Hades’ favorite person by a long shot.

The letter disappeared into Hades’ pocket.

Nico didn’t see his dad briskly strolling away, confiscated letter in tow. If he had he probably wouldn’t have even noticed anything was strange. Why would anyone be sending _him_ a letter, anyway?

* * *

 

Percy waited.

At first he was fairly confident Nico would come back. He thought that Nico had only run away because they’d had a misunderstanding. He thought that once Nico realized that Percy wasn’t upset with him he’d be willing to talk.

But the days continued to creep by and Nico didn’t show up. Percy continued attempting Iris-messages with no results.

It was becoming increasingly clear that Nico wasn’t interested in seeing or talking to Percy. And that really sucked because the more time passed the more acutely Percy missed him.

He missed Nico’s steadfast companionship. Nico had always been the most transient of Percy’s friends, but when Percy had really needed him he’d stepped up unwaveringly. He missed the intensity that Nico applied to pretty much everything he did. He missed the small glimpses he’d get when Nico thought no one was noticing and he’d slip up and show that he wasn’t _quite_ as removed from his younger self as he wanted people to believe. A bit of his geeky enthusiasm occasionally shone through his jaded exterior. Percy got the impression that he witnessed those moments a bit more than other people. Or maybe he just paid closer attention.

Had he been wrong about what Nico had meant when he said he had feelings for him? Was it really possible that could have meant something else? He hadn’t thought so, but then why wasn’t Nico talking to him?

He really hoped he wasn’t wrong.

The longer he waited the more he couldn’t stop thinking about Nico. When he woke up in the morning, the first thought he’d inevitably have was less often _I don’t want to face the world, Annabeth’s not in it,_ and more often _maybe Nico will show up today_. As he ate breakfast he couldn't stop remembering things like Nico’s attempt to make him pancakes (he hadn’t appreciated it at the time, he should have appreciated it) or all the different (sometimes interesting, sometimes not) breakfasts they’d had together in the various exotic places they’d traveled. He’d replay the conversations they’d had in his head, dissecting them to try and figure out if Nico had actually dropped any clues about his feelings. He wished he’d noticed sooner. He wished he’d been less obtuse and self-absorbed. He wished he’d handled things in a way that hadn’t chased Nico off.

He was really trying to keep himself busy because when he let his thoughts wander too unchecked his mind would start drifting to really dangerous places and he’d start thinking things like _I wonder if Nico was thinking about kissing me some of those times we were talking. I wonder what I would have done if he’d tried. I kind of wish he had._ The increasing frequency with which those sorts of thoughts were invading Percy’s mind kind of freaked him out a bit. But it freaked him out in a way that appealed to him. It gave him the same sort of feeling he got when he was planning for a quest. He knew he should be guarded because there would be unpredictable problems, but overall it would be interesting and exciting. Trying out a relationship with Nico would be really different. But _really different_ was exactly what Percy decided he wanted.

His confused feelings were definitely sorting themselves out. The only problem was that knowing how he felt only made things worse. Because Nico wasn’t around. Knowing that he _did_ return Nico’s feelings only made Nico’s absence sharper and harder to deal with.

Every day he’d inevitably be faced with the urge to go check the Hades cabin _just in case_. He knew Nico wouldn’t be in there, but he couldn’t stop himself from looking anyway. Even unoccupied the cabin’s torches kept burning, the dim room eternally glowing with flickering green light. Nico had a flair for the dramatic and Percy had to admit he thought it was cool. He thought a lot of stuff about Nico was cool. He should have let Nico know.

He couldn’t stay in the Hades cabin for very long though. It reminded him of the Underworld, and that just hurt.

As the days climbed in number without hearing from him, Percy’s constant thinking of Nico grew more and more depressive.

Was fate just being cruel to him? He’d been so happy with Annabeth and she’d been taken away from him. And then he’d been given another chance, with someone else amazing only to have that chance blow up in his face. Was he doomed to be alone and unhappy forever? Continuously haunted by the _what if_ ghosts of an alternative future?

He didn’t want to think about that.

Hanging around camp was proving not good for him. Percy was spending way too much time cleaning the Poseidon cabin. And cleaning was one of those activities that left your mind far too much room to wander and dwell on things while you work. And his mind only had one topic it was willing to dwell on, which was not a good one. All he could think about now was how he had used Nico. He couldn’t really blame him for not coming back. All the time they’d spent together and Percy had barely been giving Nico a second thought. He’d made assumptions about both what Nico and what Annabeth would want and had been wrong on both counts, completely disregarding their feelings. He’d been pretty lousy to Nico and didn’t really deserve getting a chance to be with him.

Percy was more of a doer than a thinker. Philosophizing about his horrible luck was not getting him anywhere. Nico apparently wasn’t going to show up; there was no reason for him to stay bogged down at camp. He needed to get out and be occupied. He needed to do something good to start making up for his past several months of selfish behavior. Because if he couldn’t be in the underworld than he sure as heck ought to make sure his time stuck up top was worth something.

He needed to go on a quest. He needed to go on as many quests as he could manage. He needed to convince himself that there was a good reason he was still alive. He had to somehow make a difference so that his months of misery actually had a greater purpose.

Percy practically ran to Chiron’s office.

* * *

 

Nico was not enjoying his current stay in the Underworld.

"Stop sulking," said Hades, without even bothering to look at his son. "It doesn't suit you. Lords of death are majestic and terrifying. We don't sulk."

"You sulk all the time," said Nico.

"Be quiet and finish your cereal."

"I hate cereal," complained Nico. "Why do I have to eat it? Demeter's not even here anymore. Yet you're still always force feeding me cereal."

"She overstocked the pantry," said Hades. "We need to use it up."

"So make someone else eat it."

"You're the only living mortal soul here," said Hades logically. "That makes it your job."

"Ugh." Nico smashed the unappetizing flakes around with his spoon until they dissolved into a grey sludge.

"I told you to stop sulking," complained Hades again. "What is it with you? You're being...what's that word the mortals are using these days. Elmo? Emu?"

"Emo," sighed Nico.

"Yes, that's the one. You're being emo. It's very tiresome. You're teaching my skeleton army bad habits. Knock it off."

"Leave me alone."

"It's that Jackson boy isn't it?" Continued Hades relentlessly. "Ever since you went gallivanting all over the place with him you've been unattractively morose. I'm glad you came home. I don't approve of you associating with him. He makes you mopey."

Nico glared at his dad. It turned into a glaring contest that went on for a good ten minutes. Hades won.

"Would you have accepted his offer to trade his soul for Annabeth's?" Nico finally couldn't help asking. He’d been meaning to ask all along, but he’d kept putting it off because the answer scared him. If his dad said _yes_ then that meant Percy might still actually go trough with it. Even if he’d resigned himself to not ever seeing Percy again, he still wanted Percy to be alive. The world needed him.

"Oh, Cerberus bite me, you actually have to ask that?"

Nico nodded resentfully.

"That answer should be quite obvious. I'm disappointed in you, boy."

"I'm seventeen," objected Nico. "I'm not a boy anymore."

"You just keep telling yourself that."

"Well, would you?"

"Of course not." Hades rolled his eyes dramatically. "What fool would accept a trade from a high risk case like that? He's going to end up down here any time now _anyway_. It's a miracle he survived long enough to steal the prophecy from you." Hades gave Nico a pointed look, apparently that was still a bit of a sore spot for him. "I give him three years left, tops. And that's being quite generous. If he continues on his current track he'll be dead in a matter of days."

Nico dropped his spoon and looked up at Hades in horror. " _What_?"

Hades shrugged. "Word on Olympus is that he's gone on some sort of suicidal quest bender, taking solo missions that are too big for him."

"Why didn't you _say something_!" Shrieked Nico.

"Didn't seem relevant. It’s rather in character for that idiot, isn’t it? Has nothing to do with you." Hades took a sip of nectar and went back to reading his copy of _The Underworld Times_.

"I have to stop him!" Nico jumped up from the table, looking around in a panic trying to think of the fastest way to get to Percy.

"Finish your cereal first."

Nico was gone before Hades could finish talking.

* * *

 

It wasn’t hard for Nico to find Percy. He could easily sense Percy’s life aura when he looked for it. Or at least he _should_ have been able to easily sense Percy’s life aura. This time it took a little more searching than it should have. The signal was weaker than the last time Nico had tuned in to it.

Nico found Percy five miles outside of Albuquerque. He was crouching in the dry red dirt, partially obscured by a stunted pinion pine. At first Nico thought Percy was covered in dirt too, but as he got close enough to see clearly it became clear that the mottled red splotches on Percy’s arms were burns, not dust. Percy was breathing hard.

“Percy!” He couldn’t stop himself from calling out. He couldn’t see what Percy was fighting yet, but it was clearly something bad. He wanted Percy to know he had help.

He should have waited until he figured out where the enemy was before giving himself away. There was a rustling noise behind him and Nico spun around, sword in hand. He was met by a huge lantern-like yellow eye.

Nico tried to blink. He couldn’t. He tried to swing his sword around and couldn’t do that either. Staring into that eye was like gazing into a pool of lava. It burned with a hypnotic intensity, radiating danger. But Nico couldn’t look away. There was a beauty to its terrifying depths as well. The spider web lines of red and orange crazing across the yellow orb were like a net reeling him in. He had an indescribable urge to touch it.

A sword swung mere inches in front of Nico’s face, deflecting a stream of liquid that cackled and hissed as it made contact with the metal. A few stray drops of whatever it was hit his shoulder, burning straight through his T-shirt in seconds. Searing pain tore through his skin.

The interference was enough to break the trance Nico had been caught in. He scrambled backwards, and was afforded a better view of their opponent.

A drakon.

Percy was fighting a drakon _by himself_.

Hades had not been exaggerating when he’d described Percy’s quests as suicidal. Nico cursed.

Percy was running, dodging another stream of the beast’s acidic venom. Nico was firmly locked onto Percy’s aura now. He could feel each stray splatter of venom that hit Percy with almost as much vividness as the acid that had physically touched his own skin. Percy was in a lot of pain. There was no telling how long this battle had been going on before Nico had crashed it.

He charged the monster, swinging his sword at it with all his force. He was careful to avoid making eye contact this time, but it didn’t help much. His sword bounced of the impenetrable scales without making so much as a scratch.

He swung again without better results. The drakon swiveled its head around and made a sucking noise that Nico recognized as the prelude to another venomous shower. Percy lunged and shoved him out of the way.

From where he’d rolled on the ground Nico could see Percy feverishly attacking the drakon’s face. But his blows were bouncing off without managing to hit anything vulnerable. The drakon snapped its jaws on Riptide, tearing the blade out of Percy’s hands as easily as a dog flinging a twig. It opened its toothy maw again, clearly intending to sever Percy’s head with its next bite. Nico ran straight at the open mouth, no thought to any possible consequences. He shoved his blade into the roof of the drakon’s mouth. His sword went in deep, but then stuck fast, probably stopped by the underside of scales on the drakon’s nose. It let out a horrible screeching noise and venom oozed out the sides of its jaws. Nico wasn’t able to avoid it in time and the skin on his forearms began to bubble and blister excruciatingly. The pain slowed him down and drakon was quickly on top of him, pinning him down with the thick coils of its body.

For the second time, Nico couldn’t move. Although this time is was because he was being constricted by a crushing weight, rather than merely hypnotized.

This was probably it. He was going to be done in by a stupid giant serpent. At least he’d gotten to see Percy one last time first. Too bad there hadn’t been time to even say hello.

He was going to make sure though that Percy walked away from this.

Nico used the last of his energy to tear a rift in the ground below him. A canyon opened up and Nico was airborne. He fell, still entwined in the drakon’s embrace. The impact hurt a lot. The only reason he probably survived was because the drakon was wrapped around him, and the serpent’s body absorbed some of the shock.

Unfortunately the drakon survived the fall as well. Nico was only barely conscious but he was aware enough to feel the steely rope of its body constricting again.

A small shower of rocks slid down the side of the canyon, distracting Nico’s fading attention from his captor. Percy was climbing down the rocky crevasse.

_No_ , thought Nico urgently. _Run away. There’s no point in both of us dying. Get away you idiot._ He tried to yell at Percy to stop, but he couldn’t get his voice to work properly. He was too weak and all the air had been knocked out of him by the fall.

The drakon was preoccupied with its prey. It didn’t see Percy as he made the final leap down to the gorge’s floor. It didn’t notice the sword Percy had reclaimed and was now thrusting at its face.

Riptide slid right into the drakon’s eye. Percy kept the lunge going until his blade emerged clean through the other one. He’d skewered its head like a shish kebob.

The pressure crushing Nico released in a shower of dust. His difficulty breathing lingered though. He suspected he might have broken some ribs. He hurt too much to move. He felt like he was going to pass out and he welcomed the oblivion.

“Nico!!” Percy was screaming. It was annoyingly loud. Nico just wanted to be allowed to slip into the blackness. He needed a break from his senses.

“Nico! Don’t! Keep your eyes open!” screamed Percy frantically. Nico would have shook his head but he didn’t have the energy for that.

“Oh gods, what do I do what do I do what do I do,” the rhythm of Percy’s panic was like a lullaby. “I don’t know how to fix this. Nico hang on, don’t die on me, oh gods, Nico don’t die.”

Then there was the feel of Percy’s fingers shoving his mouth open and the taste of french fries as Percy forced the ambrosia down. It was an irritating reminder that no matter how much he tried to change he couldn't sever all the remnants of his childish past. There were certain things about him that were simply _Nico_ and it was a part of his real self no matter how much he tried to distance himself, stupid junk food addictions included. It was hard to swallow when his whole upper body felt numb and broken but somehow he managed. And then Percy’s arms were picking him up and Percy was _holding_ him and Nico was distantly aware that this should bother him, but what the hell, he was dying. Dying in Percy’s arms was a pretty good way to go.

* * *

 

He expected to wake up in the underworld. Instead he woke up—head still feeling fuzzy and detached—on a cot in a dingy room with cracks in the walls and no windows. There was an Andy Warhol style poster in his immediate line of sight featuring a rainbow grid of soda cans. A beaded curtain hung next to it, although it apparently had no point, as there wasn’t any entrance behind it. The only light came from a green and yellow lava lamp.

Nico felt weak and nauseous and staring at the undulating wax in the lamp was not helping. He turned away, only to catch sight of Percy. His heart jumped. He’d really thought he was looking at Percy for the last time as his vision had been fading.

Percy was slumped on the floor next to the cot. In the dim light Nico couldn’t tell if he was awake or asleep. There was a basin of water on the floor next to him.

“Percy?” Nico’s voice sounded strange and hoarse to his own ears.

Percy immediately jerked up in response. “Nico!” he said anxiously. “Are you okay? How are you feeling?”

The answer was _I feel like I’ve been hit by a truck and then it backed over me a few extra times to finish the job_. But what Nico actually said was “I’ve felt better, but I guess I’m okay?”

“Are you sure?” Percy darted around him like a frantic bird, inspecting his neck, his eyes, feeling his forehead. There were scabs covering Percy’s arms. They still looked painful but the burns had lost their glistening angry intensity. Percy was healing already. Had the process been accelerated by magic or had Nico simply been unconscious that long?

“Well, I feel better than I did after being stuck in that jar.” Nico tried to laugh, but it turned into more of a cough. “So I think I’ll bounce back. Where are we?”

“Santa Fe.”

“Santa Fe, huh?” asked Nico, puzzled. “I always pictured someplace classier when I heard that name. What are we doing in such a dump?”

“Well, it’s not like I could just take you to a regular mortal hospital,” said Percy with a frown. “Not with a magical injury like you had. I panicked and called Chiron for help. There weren’t any camp allies in Albuquerque. But the New Mexico chapter of the Party Ponies is here in Santa Fe, so he called them and they picked us up and brought us here. You’ve been out for a long time.”

“You let _Party Ponies_ do medical treatment on me?” Nico asked skeptically. “I can’t believe I’m still alive.”

“No of course not,” said Percy quickly. “They brought a doctor with them. They keep one on speed-Iris.”

“Did somebody say PARTY?” The door suddenly creaked open and a shaggy face with sunglasses on poked through. Behind the face Nico could make out a bowling shirt with a nametag sticker on it that said ‘Hello my name is Awesome.'

“No,” lied Percy.

“Well you _should_ have,” announced Awesome. “Because one’s starting RIGHT NOW. Yeeeaaaaah, who wants to play root beer pong?”

“He’s sick,” reminded Percy, pointing at Nico.

“Dude, are you even listening?” said Awesome, clearly not listening himself. “Root beer’s like, made of _roots_ , bro. It’s practically medicine. You’ll feel better if you have some.”

“Maybe later,” said Percy, shooing the Party Pony away.

“We’ll be going all night,” persisted Awesome. “Limbo contest at ten.”

“We’ll keep that in mind.” Percy shut the door in Awesome’s face.

“Limbo contest?” Nico couldn’t help asking. “With centaurs? How does that even _work_?”

“We probably don’t want to know,” said Percy. “Though if you’re dying to find out here’s your chance.” He frowned heavily as the word ‘dying’ left his mouth. He clearly hadn’t meant to say something like that. He sat down on the cot next to Nico. “You _scared_ me,” he said seriously. “I thought you were a goner.”

“Honestly? Me too.” Nico gave Percy a pained half-smile. “I ought to say thanks for saving me, but you shouldn’t have. You should have gotten away instead of jumping after me with a death wish. That was really stupid.”

“If you think I’d _ever_ leave you behind, I’m not the stupid one,” said Percy seriously. He was giving Nico a really intense look.

Nico had to look away. He couldn't handle seeing Percy look at him like that. It felt too much like there might actually be feelings under the surface of that look, but Nico knew better than to let his mind trick him into thinking that. Percy's fatal flaw was loyalty to his friends. He would have risked his life like that for pretty much anyone. No matter how much he wanted it to, it didn't mean anything.

"Yeah, well. I'm not the one who decided to take on a drakon single handedly," muttered Nico. "So that makes you either stupid or suicidal. I'll sleep better at night assuming you're just stupid."

"I didn't know it was going to be a drakon until I got there," said Percy. "Some potential demigods had disappeared and I was just investigating. I would have called for backup if I'd known. It caught me off-guard."

He almost sounded sincere, but Nico suspected he wouldn't have actually called for backup.

"Sure," said Nico dismissively. He wondered how long he'd be stuck here. Being this close to Percy and knowing that he _knew_ was unbearable. Was he making Percy uncomfortable right now? Was Percy really as concerned about him as he was acting, or was he just faking it because Percy was a good person and always took good care of people, regardless of his feelings about them? He was afraid to look Percy in the eyes and get a hint of the answer.

"The ambrosia got the healing process started, but your injuries were really bad." Percy seemed to have read Nico's mind and answered his question unasked. "The amount of ambrosia it would have taken to completely fix them would have killed you. I’ve been using water to heal you too, but there’s only so much I can do. You're going to need to rest a while and heal the regular way. We can give you more ambrosia after a few days break."

"Fantastic," said Nico flatly.

"Don't even think about shadow-traveling until you're fully healed," said Percy sternly.

"You know me so well," said Nico sarcastically. "Good luck stopping me."

Percy closed his fingers around Nico's wrist. "I _am_ going to stop you," he said. "I'll stop you even if it means not sleeping for a week. You're not going anywhere."

Percy’s fingers were warm and felt good on Nico’s skin. He wanted Percy to never let go. He wanted him to slide his fingers down into his hand. He wanted it so bad it physically hurt. Was Percy even aware of what he was doing and the effect it had on him? Was he doing it on purpose?

“Please…don’t touch me.”

Percy reluctantly released Nico’s wrist. “Sorry,” he said unhappily. “I guess…I could get someone else from camp to come stay with you if that’s what it would take to keep you from running off before you’re healed. It…doesn’t have to be me.”

“That might be for the best,” said Nico quietly.

“Oh.” Percy sounded slightly surprised. As if he’d expected his offer to get turned down. “…Okay.”

A long uncomfortable silence stretched out between them. Percy might have let go of Nico’s wrist, but he was still sitting far too close to him for Nico’s comfort. He could feel his body heat even though they weren’t technically touching. He could feel Percy’s life force too, which was to Nico’s relief back to its normal, very alive strength.

That observation reminded Nico of what had brought him here. Percy had been deliberately putting himself in danger. Nico had come to stop him. Sure he’d succeeded in stopping him once now with the drakon, but Percy was probably going to do something like that again. He probably shouldn’t turn Percy away so quickly. Forcing him to keep vigil on an invalid was a pretty good way to prevent Percy from doing something stupidly dangerous. Nico would just have to suck it up and ignore the way that Percy’s constant proximity made his heart feel like it was being messily shoved through a paper shredder.

“Actually,” Nico forced himself to say. “You don’t have to do that. You can stay if you want. I won’t shadow travel.”

He could feel Percy’s eyes on him even though he wasn’t looking. He was grateful for the low lighting. He hoped Percy wouldn’t be able to see just how uncomfortable he was.

“Good,” said Percy. Relief was evident in his voice, which Nico found confusing. It didn’t really make sense to him that Percy would want to be chained to his bedside for days on end. He’d betrayed Percy’s trust hadn’t he? Percy ought to be acting anxious to be rid of him.

“Did you get hurt badly?” Nico asked.

“Not really. Just some burns. They’re nothing.”

Percy was lying. Nico had felt those burns, and he had several matching ones. They were definitely not ‘nothing.’ Typical.

“Did you actually know what you were getting yourself into when you started fighting that thing?” Nico asked. “You didn’t seriously think you could take it alone, did you?

“No,” agreed Percy. “I didn’t. The last one I encountered I couldn’t even defeat with…” his voice wavered slightly. “…I mean even Annabeth and I together couldn’t take it. I knew I didn’t have much of a chance.”

“So you _are_ trying to get yourself killed.”

“No,” said Percy.

“That’s really how it looks to me.”

“Well you’re wrong. I was just trying to help people.”

“Well you can’t help anyone if you’re dead,” nagged Nico.

“I know,” said Percy again. “Being dead wasn’t the plan.”

“Well that’s a first.”

“Look, I already told you I came to grips with what Annabeth said. I’m really not trying to infiltrate the Underworld. Your No-Percys-Allowed club is safe, okay?” There was a sharpness to Percy’s retort that Nico had never really heard in his voice before. It was jarring.

“Uh, when exactly did you supposedly tell me this?” Nico asked, confused.

“In my letter.”

“Letter?” Nico was even more confused.

“You didn’t get my letter?”

“I never get any letters.”

“Well you should have. I wrote you a letter. I sent it Hermes Express. The letter isn’t why you showed up?”

“I didn’t get it. I showed up because dad was bragging that you were going to kick the bucket any day now and I wanted to stop you.”

“Oh.”

“What…” He was afraid to ask. A really dangerous splinter of hope started pushing up inside of him. Nico braced himself to have it shattered. “What did it say?”

“A lot of stuff,” said Percy vaguely. “Mostly that I wasn’t mad at you. I asked you to come back to camp.”

“Oh,” said Nico. He simultaneously felt relieved and disappointed. Okay, so Percy still wanted to be friends. That was better than he could have hoped. There was no way he was going back to camp though. Being around Percy all the time was still going to hurt too much.

“And…well. You probably wouldn’t have liked the letter much, actually,” Percy mumbled. “It was a bit wishy-washy. I was still trying to sort some stuff out when I wrote it.”

“Ah,” said Nico, not really sure where Percy was leading with that.

“Have you changed your mind about me?” Percy suddenly asked.

“What…what do you mean?” Nico knew exactly what Percy meant, but the question threw him into defensive panic mode, so his brain automatically opted to stall. His voice had probably sounded near hysterical.

“You said you had feelings for me,” said Percy. “Did that change? You kind of act like you can’t stand me a lot of the time. I’m not sure what to make of it.”

Nico stared at the lava lamp, distantly hoping that maybe the hypnotic floating wax would put him to sleep so he wouldn’t have to answer Percy’s question. No such luck.

“Of course I can stand you,” Nico muttered. “Don’t be stupid.”

“Is that it though?” Percy persisted. “You’re just tolerating me then?”

“What does it matter?” Nico dodged.

"It matters a lot."

"Is my answer going to upset you?" Nico kept stalling.

"Possibly," said Percy. "It depends on your answer."

"Then you probably shouldn't ask," muttered Nico. "I'd hate to upset you."

"You already upset me by running away without talking to me. This is your chance to make that up."

"Are you trying to get revenge on me by torturing me?" asked Nico. "Because you're doing a great job. This is worse than being mauled by the drakon."

"No," said Percy simply. "I just really want to know how you feel before I say what _I_ need to say. I don't want to assume anything and then say something that might freak you out instead. I don't want to chase you off again."

Nico's heart sank. That sounded like a rejection in waiting if he ever heard one.

"Let's just skip all this and go straight to awkwardly pretending we never had this conversation then," Nico mumbled.

"Look," said Percy with a sigh. "You know when Annabeth and I got together, I never really officially asked her or anything, right? She sort of took charge in the beginning and stuff just happened. I didn't have to _do_ anything. It just naturally came together."

Nico gritted his teeth. Percy was _really_ lucky that Nico was as injured as he was. If he were better he'd have been halfway to Australia by now. Forcing him to listen to stories about hooking up with Annabeth was just plain cruel.

"How nice for you," said Nico sarcastically.

"I'm just trying to explain that I don't know what the heck I'm doing right now," Percy continued. "I don't have much practice in having a conversation like this. I've never asked anyone out before."

"Huh-wha—?" Nico's head snapped around and he finally looked Percy in the face. Percy looked...nervous? This was not making sense. Percy wasn’t someone he was used to seeing nervous. Percy was ultra-confident. He'd been half tuning Percy out in anticipation of him saying something painful. Had he misheard him just now?

"I want to try being together?" Percy asked hesitatingly. "If that's what you actually want? I hope I'm not assuming too much?"

Nico felt a little dizzy, his heart was suddenly pounding so fast. “What, _together_ -together?” he asked. “You mean like how you and Annabeth were together? But with _me_?”

Percy nodded. “Yeah.”

“Wait, are you _serious_?”

Percy nodded again. “Yeah.”

Nico gingerly touched his head. “The Party Ponies didn’t give me some kind of hallucinogenic medicine, did they?” he couldn’t help asking.

Percy laughed, although there was still a nervous edge to the laughter. “No, definitely not.”

“Okay, new theory,” said Nico. “I’m actually still caught by the drakon and the Mist is screwing with my head while I slowly suffocate. I’m talking to a rock right now instead of the real Percy. That’s what’s actually happening, isn’t it?”

“Would you _rather_ be talking to a rock right now?” Percy asked. “I could go find one for you.”

“Obviously not,” said Nico quickly. “I just don’t see how you could say something like that to me without there being a major catch.”

“The major catch is that you’re not allowed to disappear on me without warning anymore,” said Percy. “I hate when you do that.”

“But it’s totally cool _with_ warning, huh?”

“No, I’d rather you didn’t disappear at all. I really miss you.”

Nico blinked. Percy actually sounded sincere. Nico was slowly starting to actually _believe_ him. Small tendrils of happiness began unfurling in his stomach, and that was a dangerous thing to let grow unchecked. If this somehow turned out to be a joke or a mistake, and Percy took his offer back, the disappointment would break him.

“You…do?”

“ _Yes_ ,” said Percy. “Are you going to leave me hanging forever, or what? I’m kind of a nervous wreck over here. Do you want to be my boyfriend or not?”

Nico automatically started nodding his head but then froze. His brain was still screaming at him that he was setting himself up to get majorly hurt.

“What about Annabeth,” he asked miserably. He knew he was sabotaging himself by bringing her up, but he really had to be sure.

 Percy flinched. “I’m probably going to be messed up over her for a long time,” he said honestly. “But she’s gone and I’m not going to interfere anymore.”

“So I’m just like the rebound compensation prize so you don’t have to be alone,” Nico theorized aloud. “‘cause it’s obvious I wouldn’t turn you down.”

Even in the bad lighting it was impossible to miss the hurt that flashed across Percy’s face. “ _No_ ,” he said emphatically. “It’s not like that at _all_. My feelings for you don’t have anything to do with Annabeth. It’s just that I wouldn’t have realized how strong they were if this stuff hadn’t happened. Do I seem like someone who’s ready for another relationship? I sure wasn’t looking. I’m kind of freaked out by how fast this is moving. The timing isn’t ideal at all but you sort of forced my hand by running away. And now I don’t want to wait because I know you’d probably disappear again before I could ask you and I don’t want to risk losing the chance. I’d regret that a lot. So. I’m not really big on the having regrets thing right now. I’ve kind of had a wakeup call about how little time we could have. I just don’t want to lose you.”

Nico didn’t know what to say. _Strong feelings_ , huh? Percy had _strong feelings_ for him. His throat felt tight.

“I know I’ve been kind of a burden to you lately. I get it if you don’t want to put up with me right now. But maybe—“

“Shut up,” said Nico. He was done trying to talk himself out of what he wanted. So he might be setting himself up for crippling heartbreak. He’d risk it. It wasn’t every day you got handed the thing you wanted more than anything else in the world.  He leaned in, watching carefully to gauge Percy’s reaction. If he hesitated or flinched Nico would know he hadn’t really meant the stuff he’d said.

Percy didn’t hesitate. Once he realized what Nico was doing he quickly bridged the gap. Percy’s arms were snaking around Nico and his hands fisted in his shirt. They kissed tentatively at first (Percy because he was still worried about freaking Nico out and Nico because he hadn’t ever done it before,) but the pace naturally picked up and their kisses got longer and more intense.

Nico had a hard time relaxing. He’d spent so long being terrified of his feelings that it was hard to wrap his mind around the fact that Percy was actually okay with this. That Percy was more than okay with this; that Percy wasn’t just humoring him, Percy _wanted_ him. It just didn’t seem like something that could even be a possibility. But then Percy’s fingers were dragging across his back, and Percy’s tongue was questioningly running along the seam of Nico’s lips, and those weren’t really things someone would do if they didn’t want to. At least, not someone like Percy anyway. And Nico’s mouth was opening for Percy without him even telling it to. And everything Percy was doing felt way too amazing to be real.

“I’m still not convinced the Party Ponies didn’t slip me something psychedelic,” Nico finally said in a pause between kisses. He could feel Percy’s lips quirk up against his own.

“They haven’t got anything stronger than sarsaparilla and Cheetos,” he laughed. “Trust me, I checked all their cabinets when I was panicking thinking you were dying.”

“Glad I didn’t,” said Nico absently. “This was definitely worth pulling through for.”

“Not as glad as I am.” Percy’s voice turned serious. He tightened his arms around Nico protectively.

“Ow.” Nico cringed as his ribs reminded him how damaged they were. Percy immediately let go and began apologizing profusely.

"I'm fine, I'm fine," said Nico immediately. He didn't want Percy to let go. The pain from his injuries was preferable to Percy backing off. He was still feeling mildly paranoid that if he lost contact with Percy the bubble of this too-good-to-be-true fantasy would pop and he'd find he'd just imagined the whole thing.

Percy didn't go back to hugging him, but he threaded his fingers through Nico's instead. 

"If I'd known all it would take to get you to come back is almost getting eaten by a drakon, I would have done that weeks ago," Percy attempted to joke.

Nico didn't find it funny. He lightly shoved Percy. "You jerk," he muttered quietly. "What were you thinking? I already told you everyone would be devastated if you got yourself killed."

 “I wasn’t especially thinking,” replied Percy. “That was the whole point. It hasn’t exactly been pleasant in here lately.” He tapped the side of his head with his free hand. “I was trying to stay too busy to think much.”

“I know how you feel,” said Nico somberly. “But if your goal’s not thinking then you should have joined a team sport or picked a hobby that wasn’t potentially lethal.”

“Like you?” Percy gave Nico a skeptical look. “Is that what you were up to in the Underworld? Forming an intramural dodge ball team? Working on a stamp collection?”

“I was dismembering minions of the undead,” said Nico seriously. “And I wasn’t distracted while I did it.”

“Sure you weren’t,” Percy scoffed.

“I wasn’t,” said Nico indignantly. “I’m very focused when I’m training. I saved my pity parties for _after_. It was like a reward. Shatter twenty skeletons: earn twenty minutes of wallowing. Everyone wins.”

Percy smiled. He could easily envision Nico’s dark and pensive expression while cleaving his iron sword through hordes of skeletons. He liked watching Nico fight. Although he rarely got the opportunity to pay attention as usually if Nico was fighting it meant he was too.

“Well. I might not have been _trying_ to get myself killed, but I wasn’t exactly overly worried about it either. Everyone I wanted to see was in the Underworld. Either I saved a bunch of innocent people or I got to see _you_ again. Seemed pretty win-win.”

“That is definitely _not_ a win-win.” Nico squeezed Percy’s hand hard. It wasn’t lost on him that Percy had said _see you_ rather than _see Annabeth_.

“Well I like how things turned out better,” agreed Percy. “Definitely a bigger win.”

“I’m still pretty shocked you feel that way,” admitted Nico.

“It kind of snuck up on me,” said Percy. “I didn’t notice until you said something. But once you made me think about it, it seemed kind of obvious. You’ve always been more central in my attention than other people. I thought it was just because I felt responsible about Bianca. But…spending so much time with you made me realize there was more of a connection than just that. I wish you’d said something sooner.”

“Why?” asked Nico. “It wouldn’t have changed anything. You still would have been with Annabeth, right?”

Percy nodded. “Yeah. I just feel like I should have known.”

“It just would have made you feel guilty. And I would have felt worse because I couldn’t feel rejected so long as you had no idea how I felt. It was better you didn’t know.”

“I wish you hadn’t left for three years though,” said Percy. “I missed you.”

“I had to go. It was too hard to be around…” Nico paused, his eyes obviously wandering towards Percy. “…Camp.”  

“But you’ll stay now?” Percy pressed.

Nico was silent. He hadn’t really thought about that part of being with Percy yet. The getting together hurdle had seemed too improbable for him to ever waste time theorizing what he’d do once they started dating. He was ecstatic to learn that Percy returned his feelings. He felt a bit less enthusiastic about the idea of permanently residing at Camp Half-Blood. It’s not that he didn’t like camp or anything, he just never felt like he belonged there. The other campers frequently made him uncomfortable.

“If that’s where you’re set on being,” Nico nodded. “I’ll go where you want. For now.”

Percy grinned at him. “ _Good_ ,” he said. He took in Nico’s more serious expression. “Can I tell people about us?”

Nico paled. “Why—why would you want to?”

“Because I’m happy about being with you,” said Percy.

“Other people won’t be happy though. They’ll give us a hard time.”

“No they won’t,” said Percy. “They’ll be happy for us.”

Nico shook his head. “They won’t. They definitely won’t. It’ll make them uncomfortable. I’ll drag you down into being an outcast and a freak if people find out.”

“No you won’t. Nico, our friends aren’t like that. They don’t see you like that. And they’re not going to see me that way by association, either.”

“I don’t have any friends,” said Nico quietly.

“That’s definitely not true. What about Jason?”

“Jason is just nice to me because he’s nice to everyone, like you. He feels sorry for me or something. But you can tell Jason if you want, I guess. I know he won’t tell anyone else.”

“You have more friends than just Jason. But we’ll start there. We don’t have to tell anyone one else right away. We can work up to that. I’d like to tell my mom though, is that okay?

Nico reluctantly nodded. “Yeah…” he said, fear evident in his voice. “Yeah, that’s an okay place to start.”

Percy smiled warmly at him. He pulled Nico in for another kiss.

* * *

 

Nico braced himself for the fallout: the judging looks he knew they’d get, the whispering behind their backs, the outright insults. He hadn’t been willing to take that kind of abuse when he thought his feelings were unrequited. It would have been unbearable. Having Percy supportably at his side though made a difference. That was worth it, he knew he could handle it. He just didn’t especially _want_ to. Percy’s determination to go public with their relationship status was baffling to him. Why would he want to face all that grief when they could just be happy together in secret? It wasn’t even solely the unconventionality of their relationship that made Nico feel that way. Even had Percy been a girl, Nico still wouldn’t have considered himself much of a prize to show off. That Percy would want to advertise that he was now with not only a guy, but a son of Hades seemed just crazy.

The fallout never came though. When Percy dragged Nico to his mom’s apartment Sally Jackson lit up at the sight of her son. Her hundred-watt smile didn’t flicker when Percy declared Nico was his boyfriend. If anything she beamed wider. The next thing Nico knew she was busy baking blue cookies and treating him as if he’d always been a member of the family.

When Paul got home from work he seemed a bit surprised and confused. But his hesitation lasted only a few seconds and then he was smiling too and offering to take everyone out for dinner.

Nico had no memories of being part of a functional, loving family setting like this. He knew his mom had loved him of course, he’d seen the evidence of that. But that didn’t help the void he felt at not being able to remember her. And he knew his dad cared. He was protective if not affectionate. But still. Nothing in his realm of experience had felt like _this_. He’d been reluctant to make the visit, but Nico found himself not wanting to leave.

He was less nervous going to see Jason. He didn’t even have to say anything this time. The moment Jason saw them together (they weren’t even doing anything to give themselves away like holding hands,) he gave Nico a knowing smile and suggested that they go somewhere to talk.

They’d barely gotten the door of the Hades cabin closed before Jason was grinning and punching him in the shoulder.

“Congratulations man,” he said. “It’s so good to see you guys.”

Nico felt himself flush. “We’re not _that_ obvious are we?” he asked in dismay.

“Nah, not to anyone else,” said Jason cheerfully. “But you’re together and both look happy. That’s a first since…ever. What else would I assume?”

“I don’t know. Maybe we just accidently visited a shadow realm where it rains cheeseburgers every half hour. Don’t make assumptions about stuff like this!”

“Okaaaay,” said Jason, raising a skeptical eyebrow. “Did you just take a vacation in cheeseburger land?”

“No. “ Nico sighed. “We’re together.”

“Called it,” said Jason. He turned and gave Percy thumbs up. “Good decision. Glad you sorted everything out.”

“Hey,” Nico peered at Jason suspiciously. “Have you two been _talking_?”

“He didn’t tell me anything,” Percy quickly cut in. “But I needed to talk to _someone_. You were my first choice but someone didn’t want to be available.”

“Hm.” Nico still looked at Percy and Jason suspiciously.

“Hey, talking to him helped me figure out what I wanted. Don’t bash it.”

“So have you told Hazel yet?” Jason asked to change the subject.

Guilt flooded Nico’s face. “No.”

“You should,” said Jason. “She’ll be happy for you.”

Nico shrugged.

“That’s what I keep telling him,” Percy agreed. “I mean, I’m a pretty good catch, if I do say so myself. She’ll have to approve.” He laughed good-naturedly.

Nico didn’t echo Percy’s humor. “She grew up in the same time period I did,” he said seriously. “And in a very conservative region. She doesn’t have to approve at all.”

“That won’t matter,” said Percy. “She loves you. It really upset her when you left. She’ll just want to know you’re happy.”

“Maybe.” Nico didn’t look convinced.

“You ought to at least visit her, even if you don’t tell her right away,” said Jason. “She wants to see you. Though it would be better if she heard the news from you first. Someone else might find out by accident and tell her. She’d be really hurt if she didn’t find out from you directly.”

Nico opened his mouth to say something along the lines of ‘I will make sure that _no one_ finds out by accident’ but caught a glimpse of Percy’s eyes. Percy suddenly looked a lot less happy than he did a moment ago.  Percy wanted people to know. Percy wanted _everyone_ to know. Nico’s secretiveness bothered him.

“I’ll visit her very soon,” Nico acquiesced. “And…I’ll probably tell her eventually. Maybe.”

“I could invite her and Frank here for a visit,” Jason offered. “You could surprise them.”

“Hey now,” said Nico quickly. “I didn’t agree to tell Frank anything.”

“It’s not fair to expect Hazel to keep secrets from Frank,” said Jason. “It’s a real strain to keep things from the person you spend the most time around.”

Nico suspected Jason was talking about Piper there, rather than Frank. Great, that’s one more person he was probably about to get bullied into coming out to.

“You bring up an excellent point as to why I shouldn’t tell Hazel,” Nico stubbornly retorted.

“You can’t seriously be worried about Frank,” said Percy. “Telling Frank is about as scary as telling a big teddy bear or labrador retriever or something. There is no way in Tartarus he’ll take that badly.”

“Uh, you didn’t see him in Venice,” said Nico seriously. “Or in the Necromantium. Frank is possibly the scariest guy I know.”

“He’s only scary if someone is threatening to hurt Hazel. In other words a very good argument for telling her immediately.” Jason looked at Nico pointedly. “You should _trust me_ on that.”

Nico sighed very loudly. Both Percy and Jason’s eyes were intently fixed on him, their expressions very serious and expectant. It was very hard to actively disappoint Percy. He wanted him to go back to looking at him in the happy and affectionate way that he had been doing ever since he’d woken up in Santa Fe.

“Fine,” he grumbled. “ _Fine_. Invite Hazel and Frank to come visit. Invite Piper too for crying out loud. Have a flipping dinner party. You can order custom bowls with ‘Nico and Percy are dating’ inscribed on the bottom, so everyone will get a big surprise when they finish their soup. Will that make you two happy?”

Percy and Jason looked at each other and broke into a grin.

“Yeah,” said Percy.

“That should just about do it,” agreed Jason.

Nico blanched. “No, wait guys, I wasn’t being serious.”

They weren’t listening to him. “I’ll get the invitations printed if you get the bowls,” said Percy.

“I can _totally_ get the bowls,” agreed Jason. “Color preference?”

“Blue,” said Percy. “Blue bowls. Blue soup.”

“No, _guys_ ,” Nico was flailing. “Seriously, _don’t do that._ ”

“Think white text will show up enough through the soup?” asked Jason.

“Oh definitely.” Percy nodded. “White and blue will be totally classy. Everyone will love it.”

“ _Guys_.” Nico’s protest fell on deaf ears.

* * *

 

“See, that was hardly the end of the world now, was it?”

“It could have been.” Nico had to object just on principal. In actuality though he agreed completely. He felt better than he could ever remember feeling.

In the end he had begrudgingly let Jason invite their friends over for dinner. There hadn’t been any embarrassing gimmicks like custom dinnerware fortunately, but that hadn’t made the evening any less terrifying for Nico. He hadn’t been sure if he was actually going to go through with saying anything, all he really agreed to was being present and talking to people; a terrifying prospect in itself. He’d been gone for three years. Intense questioning would be inevitable. And he’d never really considered any of these people his actual friends. Hazel was the only one he’d ever let himself believe he had a real connection with, and he was never really sure how much of that was genuine or just gratefulness on her part because Nico had rescued her.

There was no mistaking her happiness at seeing him again though. She lit up like a neon sign when she realized Nico was there.

The others seemed surprisingly pleased to see him as well. It was hard for Nico not to feel suspicious that there was something no one was telling him. There had to be a different reason they were all acting pleased. It couldn’t possibly be because they _actually_ wanted to see someone like him. Right?

But as the evening progressed, Nico was reminded more and more of how he missed being part of a group, even if it was a group where he’d always felt like little more than a tolerated outsider. It had been lonely living in seclusion for three plus years.

And as the conversations flowed, Percy’s chair seemed to mysteriously inch closer to Nico’s. His gestures fell increasingly closer to Nico’s personal space. Their arms kept casually brushing; Percy’s fingers would find excuses to land on Nico’s hand or forearm. Nico kept waiting for someone to notice and comment but no one did. And then in the middle of a particularly animated story, Percy jovially flung his arm around Nico’s shoulders. Nico stiffened, but didn’t object. And though he could feel his face burning, Nico didn’t shove him off when Percy didn’t pull his arm away. For a while they got no attention. Then the questioning looks did start. Piper noticed first, her inquisitive eyes darting first to Percy, then to Nico. He almost reacted by flinging Percy off and running out of the room, but there had been no malice in Piper’s stare. Her expression was curious but not judgmental. So Nico swallowed his screaming nerves and smiled at her.

And that must have been his undoing. Apparently the sight of Nico _smiling_ was more noteworthy than Percy’s open display of closeness. Every eye in the room was immediately on him.

Percy coughed.

Nico eyed the sliver of shadow being cast by his fork and wondered if he could somehow fit into it.

“Nico?” Hazel’s voice was tentative and confused. “Are you okay?”

Nico nodded dumbly. “Very okay,” he assured her.

“Good,” she said, although the statement felt incomplete. Like she was waiting for elaboration.

Nico closed his eyes and swallowed hard. He bit his lip. And although he’d originally planned on making Percy do the telling, he was suddenly spilling the news himself. He talked fast before his mind could rebel and freeze up midsentence.

“PercyAndIAreTogether,” he said with a gulp. The words weren’t quite as hard to get out as he’d expected.

“That’s great.” Hazel’s smile reached her eyes.

And just like that the eating resumed and conversations picked back up as if the dinner party had not just been interrupted with an earth-shattering announcement. It was a bit anti-climatic, really.

Although now the food for some reason was tasting better. And the humorous banter was easier to pay attention to. And when Percy reached for his hand under the table Nico had no anxiety letting him take it, and that was a first. It felt great.

Their fingers were still entwined now, hours later, lying in Percy’s bed.

“Told you they’d be cool with it,” Percy was gloating.

Nico nodded but didn’t say anything. He felt like he ought to argue, but he was glad to have been proven wrong. A paralyzing tension that he’d grown so used to he’d lost awareness of even carrying around had finally dissolved. He felt like a different person almost.

“Thank you for doing that,” Percy continued, rolling over so that he was on his side and facing Nico. “It meant a lot to me.”

“No problem,” Nico lied.

“Now we don’t have to be worried and careful all the time,” said Percy. “We can focus on each other instead of other people.”

Nico met Percy’s eyes. There was an intensity in Percy’s celadon gaze when he said ‘focus on each other’ that put fiery knots in Nico’s stomach. Yeah, everything he’d been through to this point was worth it a hundred times over to have Percy look at him like that. He’d personally deliver their news to every monster in Tartarus if it meant Percy wouldn’t stop.

“Yeah,” Nico agreed. “We should maybe get practicing on that.”

“I’m a big believer in practice.” Percy leaned forward so that their faces were almost touching. He wrapped his arm around Nico so that his fingers threaded through his hair.

Nico kissed him first. They didn’t stop for hours.

 


End file.
